Falling into Lust (Until I Fall into Love)
by Ninjawolf1313
Summary: Sometimes when you meet someone you realize that they, like you, are damaged. Sometimes we find our way back to the ones we had fallen in love with, even if we don't remember them. Sometimes we have to fall into lust to be set on the right path. Sometimes we have to take a risk, even when you know in the end you will be left alone. Sometimes there is beauty in pain. O/C
1. Chapter 1

**Falling into Lust (Until I Fall into Love)**

**I was posting this story once before but took it down do to change of plot. This is story is completely finished, and it's so far 14 chapters unless I decide to add a little more. This isn't a normal Yu Yu story, but the ending is more upbeat despite the twist. The title explains it very well. Review and let me know what you think!**

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**Chapter one: 15 years later**

It seemed like so long ago that he was only a teenager who always seemed to have Death knocking at his door. So many people he had met and so many people and demons he had killed. It seemed like so long ago but in reality it was only 15 years later. Who knew that so much could change in 15 years?

Back in his youth he had his friends and the only girl he ever had any feelings for. Keiko –how he wish he could turn back time. There was so much that he could have done –should have done –but he made her wait and chose his own selfish needs over her. He was a kid; he had no idea just how important his time with her was. Only now when it was too late did he see that she was everything.

He was still the same sarcastic Yusuke Urameshi he had always been –at least outwardly. No one knew just how much he changed –just how differently he felt. He was now in his thirty's but the only difference in his appearance was he looked like a man instead of a kid. His age did not show but Keiko…to him she was still beautiful.

_"I can't do this Yusuke. You know I love you but…look at me! How can we be together when I'm going to die before you?" _she had screamed, and the only thing Yusuke could do was remain silent, his brown eyes oddly cold as he watched her breakdown.

She was hurting, crying and she couldn't handle the fact that now his demon side dominated his human half. She used to be able to ignore what he really was but now he was different, not the kid that she fell in love with. He was a demon and it was killing her.  
So he let her go.

He sighed as he stared up at his ceiling. That was at least three years ago but the pain was still raw. Something inside of him was missing and he was…he felt so cold that most of the time he was on auto pilot. Was it a demon thing? Wasn't he supposed to be fighting for her? Instead he sat at home, her ghost walking around and taunting his mind with what he could never have.

He should have told her he loved her more, he should have hugged her more, cherished her. But instead he ignored her and just like when he was a child ditched her for other things. He was an asshole and so he let her go and prayed that she would find someone who could give her what she wanted.

But now that she found love in someone else, he was kicking himself and drowning in regret. He shouldn't have let her go. He should have told her, shown her how he felt.

It was too late. He had never seen her as happy as she had been for the last year. She had married and was living a normal human life –the one thing she had always wanted and he could never give. He watched over her but she never saw him there. He just wanted her to be happy and he did as he never did as a kid –he put her before he put himself.

"Yusuke, Its Kuwabara. Me and Kurama…oh I mean Shuichi are coming over. Get dressed and come open the damn door!"

Yusuke rolled his eyes before getting up out of his bed and ignoring the answering machine that had at least five unread messages. Without bothering to brush his long black mane, he pulled it back in a hair tie and with a deep sigh headed towards the living room.

He used to hide his tattoos but he stopped giving a shit about looking normal. Keiko was bothered by it so he did it for her sake, but there was no longer a point. He really couldn't care less what others thought of him.

Even in his own home he wore shirts that covered as much of his tattoos as possible. She used to not be blinded by what he was but as she got older…she realized that what he was is who he is - a demon.

He roughly flung the door open and glared at the two men standing on his front porch. The tallest was getting ready to start pounding on the door –his large fist hovering in front of Yusuke's face before he slowly lowered it. His orange hair still looked exactly the same but age had put a few gray hairs in the places by his ears. He hardly had any wrinkles and was even more fit now than when he was younger.

The other man stood slightly behind him though age had been much kinder to him –he hardy looked any different. He had his long red hair pulled back much more neatly than Yusuke's, and his bright green eyes were staring at him sharply. Nothing ever fooled Kurama but his fox friend never pressed him. Yusuke gave him a small glance before turning back to Kuwabara.

"What do you want?" he questioned rudely.

"I'm getting your ass out of this house! I don't care what happened between you and Keiko, that doesn't mean forget about your friends because you're too busy drowning in your own self-pity."

"Is that what I'm doing," Yusuke said sarcastically as he leaned against the doorway.

"Dude, you reek!" Kuwabara screeched as he covered his nose and jumped away from his friend.

"Perhaps you should go shower Yusuke. We're taking you somewhere today and it would do no good if you scare everyone away with your odor," Kurama said lightly as he stepped closer to the doorway.

Yusuke rolled his eyes, "Aren't you a comedian."

"I do try," was Kurama's reply as he sat politely on the couch and picked up the untouched morning paper.

Yusuke stared at him for a moment, the small joke going over his head before heading to the bathroom. He really could use a shower.

Once he was clean and could almost get his fingers through his hair, he put on a pair of worn baggy jeans and a clean white tee-shirt. He tied his hair back, put on his sneakers and then headed towards where his friends were waiting for him.

"What is it that you bozos are making me do today?" Yusuke asked as he sat down in his brown plush chair.

"Well," Kuwabara said from the tan love-seat, "I was thinking that we could go get some dinner at that diner down the road. They have great food."

"Than perhaps later you can come with me to my mother's house. She is moving and needs help with the heavy lifting," Kurama offered but he had a demanding undertone. Yusuke had a feeling that no was not an option.

"Whatever, let's just get going."

The three men walked out of the small house and towards Kuwabara's dark blue van. Without saying a word, Yusuke jumped in the back and turned his attention to the passing trees while his friends fell into a conversation about politics. No matter how old Yusuke became he will always see politics as stupid and a waste of time -Like school.

"We're here," Kuwabara announced as he started to get out of the van.

Yusuke sighed, a flash of his sadness peaking through before he smoothed his face over and followed his friends. He put his hands in his pockets, something he had always done and it drove Keiko mad. She wanted to hold hands but how could she if he walked with his hands in his pockets?

He didn't even bother to look around the diner as he slid into the booth next to Kurama. Kuwabara was too big of a guy to share a booth with either of them. Not to mention he ate like a pig.

"How is work going Yusuke?" Kurama asked kindly.

Yusuke was a self-defense teacher –something else that bothered Keiko. He couldn't get away from the fighting.

"Fine," he said gruffly, "How is your flower shop doing? Still get hit on 24/7?"  
Kurama chuckled, "Unfortunately. However, I am no longer mistaken for a female."

"Good. I was tired of getting mistaken for your boyfriend. Talk about weird," Kuwabara mumbled before smiling brightly at the waitress.

"Hey baby," he said softly.

Yusuke felt something hard hit against his chest but he ignored it as he looked up at the waitress.

"Oh. Hey Yukina, I didn't know you worked here," Yusuke said but he was surprised by how much she changed. How long has it been since he hung out with everyone?

"It's fun actually. It's nice to see you Yusuke," she said sweetly but her red eyes were coated in her concern. She didn't believe his act either.

Yukina was now a mother –her 100 year mark hitting -and even though Kuwabara wasn't the father he acted like it. They had a family together and despite Kuwabara's humanity it didn't change anything for them. Their love was stronger.

In her adulthood Yukina had grown a couple of inches, and the blue tee-shirt and black shorts she was wearing showed that she had grown in other ways to. She wore her blue hair back in a ponytail, obviously not caring that people looked down on that sort of thing. She was a lot like her brother though he still pretended that they weren't related. Yusuke hadn't seen Hiei since he turned 20.

"I already have your orders Kazuma and Shuichi; I just need yours Yusuke."

"I'll just have whatever Kuwabara's getting but I want a beer."

He ignored the worried looks that were passed around the table.

"Well, are you going to come and eat with us baby? It's almost your lunch break."

Yusuke blocked out the rest, their sickeningly sweet love only stabbing his heart and making him wish that he was anywhere else but where he was at. Even when Yukina walked away he didn't tune back in. Instead he looked around the small diner, examining the random pattern of the blue and white tiles and the red table tops that looked fairly worn.

"Come on, I'll give you a big tip if you go on a date with me."

"I already told you no, so just leave me alone okay?"

"I'll leave you alone when you go on a date with me. But after the night we'll have you'll only come begging for more."

"Let go of me!"

It was a small commotion and even though it was across the diner Yusuke heard every word. Some of the people sitting next to the group of guys that were harassing the small brown-haired waitress were staring, but not doing a damn thing to help. Things like that are what piss Yusuke off.

"What's going on over there?" Kuwabara asked since he couldn't quite hear what was being said.

"Hailey, go take care of my tables for a bit."

Yusuke paused, his butt hovering over the cracked seat as he watched another woman approach the table. The men began snickering, saying worst things to her than what they were saying to the younger girl since this woman was indeed that –a woman. She seemed to be a little taller –somewhere around 5, 7, and from here all Yusuke could see was long dark blonde hair and pale skin.

"You can sit down all the way Yusuke. You won't need to interfere," Yukina said calmly as she sat down their food and drinks and then sat herself down by Kuwabara.

"What do you mean?" Yusuke questioned, but Yukina didn't need to answer.

The men watched as the small woman grabbed the man by the throat and lowered her face down to his.

"If you ever talk to my baby sister like that again than I will personally rip out your fucking throat. You better not so much as look at her ever again do you here me?"

"Yes," the man choked.

"Good, now I want you to take out all the money in your wallet and put it on the table. All of you!" she hissed but her voice was smooth and calm –deadly.

"And why should we listen to you little lady?" one of the men questioned.

She chuckled sinisterly before her fist swung back and connected with the large mans face. The surprise of her hit knocked him backwards and into the man sitting in the same side of the booth.

"Here you crazy bitch, you can have all of it!" one of the men yelled before they booked it for the doorway.

The woman stood there for a moment, her hair covering her face from view before she called her sister over and motioned at the table.

"That's one tough chick," Kuwabara mumbled.

"Her name is Sam. She is well liked here but has a nasty temper. The regulars know not to mess with her sister. They were most likely visiting," Yukina said as she took another bite of her salad.

Yusuke popped a French-fry into his mouth but he couldn't take his eyes off of her. She jumped right back into it, her smile kind though small and he couldn't help but wish that he could see her up close. She was smooth, not only in the way she spoke to her costumers but in how she walked and sat down huge plate of food.

Everywhere she went she caused lighthearted laughter though she never laughed herself. She just kept her same small smile.

"Urameshi, did you hear a single thing I just said?"

"Huh?" Yusuke said stupidly as he snapped his eyes away from the woman who was currently making a two-year-old giggle by puffing out her cheeks.

"Are you coming to Jayden's seventh birthday party tomorrow? She's been dying to see you," Kuwabara said but he didn't notice how Yusuke's eyes kept flickering towards the right.

Yusuke went to put another fry in his mouth but only felt an empty plate. When did he eat his burger? And where did his beer go? Usually he would have asked for more by now…

"Sure," he said absentmindedly.

"What has you so distracted Yusuke?"

He turned towards Kurama, not missing the knowing tone he had and by the dark look in his eyes it was apparent that he didn't agree with what Yusuke had been paying attention to.

There was something about the way his old friends eyes flickered over to the waitress that had Yusuke wondering if Kurama knew her, but the thought was soon out of the half-demons mind.

"Obviously it's the whole thing with Keiko that has him so distracted. Aren't you supposed to be smart or something?" Kuwabara mumbled.

Yusuke frowned. It's been at least 20 minutes since he last thought of Keiko. That wasn't normal.

"Yukina, do you think you can cover for me next Friday? Hailey is graduating high school and you know…I'm the only family she has."

"Of course I can Sam. You cover for me all the time."

Yusuke was frozen. She had she iciest blue eyes he had ever seen on a normal human, but while they were hard they weren't cold. Her hair was long and cascaded down her back in small golden waves. She was a healthy weight -a little bustier than what was normal for her size, and a little more to her stomach than what woman now a days preferred, but it only added to her appeal. All Yusuke could do was stare.

And then she looked at him.

He felt something in his chest jump as air refused to reach his lungs. She was so unbelievably breathtaking that he couldn't peel his eyes away. Her eyes were crystal clear yet guarded; her eyelids lowered slightly which made even a slight glance look sexy though it was unintentional.

It was like she was probing his soul yet...she seemed so distant.

It was her that broke the eye contact, her eyes glancing slightly behind him where Kurama sat before turning back to Yukina.

"Thank you, I'll see you tomorrow -2 o'clock right?"

"Right," Yukina said lightly.

Sam gave her a small smile before waving and walking away.

Yusuke watched her every step.

Yukina had to get back to work so the three men said their goodbyes and left the diner. Yusuke kept his eyes in front of him, knowing already that he could never act on his desire towards her. Lesson learned.  
When they pulled up to Kurama's mother's house there were already two moving trucks parked in front of the house. Yusuke jumped right in to it, not wanting to talk to anyone. He busied himself in work, his mind slowly being put to ease as he lifted couches and other "heavy" things.

"Yusuke, we need to talk."

And here it comes, the talk everyone wants to have with him because of their concern for his safety and all of that other crap.

"You know it would be dangerous to pursue her."

Now this Yusuke wasn't expecting.

He sat down the wooden rocking chair and turned his full attention to Kurama.

"What?" Yusuke questioned, completely taken back and a little confused.

"Sam, she is a normal human girl who knows nothing of what we are. I would suggest keeping her at arm's length."

Yusuke rolled his eyes, "Yeah, I know that already. There is no reason to be worried. I doubt I'll ever see her again."

"She is coming to Jayden's birthday party tomorrow."

Yusuke froze, half bent down since he was going to pick up the rocking chair again. Instead he straightened up to his full height. He now stood at 6 foot 2, and had to looked down at Kurama though it was slight.

"Great," he mumbled and despite himself the news made something in his chest tighten –he desired to see her again.

"I guess I just won't go since you're so concerned," Yusuke said as he put back on his smart-ass facade. Kurama however knew better. He always had been able to see right through Yusuke.

"I'm not saying avoid her Yusuke. But keep in mind that nothing good will ever come out of a relationship. Your time here is limited -As is mine."

Yusuke lifted the chair into the moving truck but his face was oddly void of emotion. He really had no idea what he was feeling; everything so jumbled up that he couldn't seem to make sense of it.

Kurama, feeling like he had said enough walked away and went to go lift the lamp out of his mother's arms. Yusuke closed his eyes and fought off the desolation that threatened to overcome him. His friend was right, Keiko had proven that and she had known about who and what he was.

Besides, there is no one that he could love more than he loved Keiko.

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**When I first posted this chapter someone said Sam was a Mary-sue, which she is not. You are seeing her how Yusuke is seeing her. Next chapter you will see more of Sam, so be patient if you don't like how she is described...also, what is up with Kurama? Such a secretive man.**

Next chapter will be out soon. Please review =]


	2. Chapter 2

**Falling into Lust (Until I Fall into Love)**

**Thank you to all of you who put this story on your fav's or alert list. Also, thank you to pourquoibella for your review!**

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**Chapter two: Tall, Dark and an Asshole**  
The sun was shining, the birds chirping but she was nothing but pissed off. Her feet were tapping in an angry tune as she glared heatedly at the fidgety boy standing nervously before her.

"You want to marry my sister? You're barely even out of high school," she said crudely and the boy visibly flinched.

"I know…but I love her."

Now it was Sam's turn to flinch.

"Love?" she said darkly as her eyes narrowed even more.

"Yeah, love," he said breathlessly but he wasn't backing down.

She wanted to laugh in his face, better yet slam her fist in to it, but that was adding her own personal issues where they don't belong. This was about her sister, not her. The boy before her was nothing special but he was nice, honest and loyal. He would treat her well.

Sam sighed, "As long as it's not rushed. You will both be going away to collage soon and anything can happen in that time. You still have yet to ask her though."

The boy smiled, his green eyes lit up from within and obviously confident that she would say yes. Sam watched with stoic eyes as he ran outside to find his long term girlfriend. She hoped that it worked out for her sister. Their family wasn't very involved (thank god), and love wasn't something that they grew up with. That was why she got her sister away from everything and moved her to a different city. It was tough and Sam had to miss out on a lot, but it was worth it. She couldn't let her own personal baggage interfere with her sister who hardly remembered their life from before.

She didn't want her sister to remember. Hell, even she didn't want to remember but the chance of her forgetting her childhood was slim to none.

Sam sighed before grabbing her keys and for the first time in the four years that they have been dating, left her sister home alone with her boyfriend. She was hardly a child anymore. As she walked away from the house she heard squeals of joy, the pitch high and exultant. Sam smiled slightly, happy for her sister, but as she began the short walk to Yukina's house she did not look back.

Instead she concentrated on the slight wind that kept blowing her hair into her face. It was warm, the clean air soothing and easing her mind to where she was slightly dazed. It must have been 10 minutes but she was so lost in herself that she was surprised when the medium-sized white house came into view.

She really didn't know Yukina that well but she liked her as a person, and despite her questionable appearance Sam trusted her to an extent. She knew she would never betray her out of selfish needs, and every time Sam needed her at work she was there and visa-versa. It was nice to have someone to depend on -even if it was just with work.

She went to the back of the house like she was told to, and already she could hear the laughter of children and adults. She paused in her step before taking a deep breath and walking the rest of the way.

Little kids were running around with squirt guns and a few times they almost ran into her –a few muttered apologies being carried through the wind as they passed. Sam watched them go, her eyes void though she was watching how the children were happy in a way she never was -remembrance of her past making bitter hatred boil in her blood. Every time she laughed her father would whirl on her and each time a slap to the face would ruin whatever it was that made her happy in the first place. In time she stopped seeing the joy in things and became a human shell. If not for her sister she would never find a reason to smile.

"Sam, over here!"

She looked to her right where a bunch of tables were group together and saw Yukina and her husband. Sam minded her own business, but she often mentally questioned their relationship. Yukina looked about Sam's age, 26 and no older but it was obvious that Kazuma was a tad older. Not to mention that their daughter had the same aqua hair and red eyes, but she let it go and headed over towards where they sat in lawn chairs -pushing her inner turmoil aside as she always did when it was brought to she surface.

There was another red-haired man sitting beside Yukina and Sam, after a long moment, remembered him from yesterday. He was at the restaurant but she was too engrossed in her work to really pay him any mind. He was handsome, that was for sure, and it was like his bright green eyes were staring very intently at her very soul. She briefly wondered what the scrutiny was for but pushed it aside, a small headache beginning to form like her mind was trying to jog some long forgotten memory.

"Hey," she said casually as she took one of the free chairs.

"You look like you have had a long day," Yukina said softly.

Sam's mouth twitched slightly. She didn't like it when people read into her actions like Yukina always did.

"Hailey is getting married."

"That's wonderful!" Kazuma piped in, but all Sam did was cross her legs and lean back into the green plastic chair.

"You look put-off by it. Do you not like her fiancé?"

Sam turned her head to the red-haired man, and stared him square in the eye. She ignored the slight twist in her heart and the sudden pulse in her head.

"He is sweet and they have been together throughout high school, but anything can happen. I don't want her to rush into something only to have it fall apart because she didn't think everything through."

"You sound like a suitable mentor," he said smoothly, and for a moment she couldn't help but wonder if he was testing her. She once again pondered what the scrutiny was for. His gaze was outwardly polite, his actions seeming like they are fueled by his curiously. Sam however wasn't fooled. She hoped that her stern gaze told him so. It was not appreciated.

As she examined him she began to get the feeling that she had seen him before yesterday at some point in her life. After a moment's struggle to jog her stubborn memory she remembered –he comes to the diner every now and again. How come she didn't recognize him?

"Oh Sam, this is Shuichi by the way. Sorry we didn't introduce you earlier," Yukina said lightly, her red orbs looking at Shuichi questionably before softly gazing at Sam.

Her husband put his arm around Yukina before saying, "Urameshi is somewhere -most likely raiding the refrigerator again."

"He is."

Everyone looked up to where a tall brown-haired woman smoking a cigarette was standing. She was older than rest of them –maybe in her early 40's, but she must have been a Ninja in her younger days because Sam didn't hear her arrive.

"Shizuru, this is Sam. We work together," Yukina said happily.

"Nice to meet you," Sam said politely.

"Like wise," the woman responded before walking towards the children.

"My sister is so rude," Kazuma mumbled under his breath.

"Yukina, do you mind if I go inside to the bathroom?" Sam suddenly questioned.

The way the red-haired man named Shuichi was watching her made her very uncomfortable. There was something about him that made her uneasy though she didn't feel threatened by him. It was an odd feeling and her hearts seemed like it was trying to burst out of her chest, not to mention that she was dying to get away from this family like environment. She could feel him watching her, no doubt contemplating her abrupt actions.

It was painful to be around, and he was only making her discomfort that much more unbearable. Even at work she would randomly disappear, her need for some solitude too strong to ignore when around so many families.

"Not at all. Just go through the backdoor and it should be your second door on the left."

Sam flashed a small smile before hurrying away. Once she was inside she pressed her back to the glass door and closed her eyes for a moment. Why did she come when she hardly even knew these people? Was she trying to prove something to herself by doing something completely unlike her?

She was always a loner, distant, her little sister being the only person that she opened up to and even Hailey didn't get a good visual of the things that Sam thought and felt. For so long she hid behind a smile, always seeming so confident and calm when really she was scared; scared to live and scared to feel because she knew that her past was only a step behind her. She could never escape it.

She opened her eyes and froze.

Brown eyes, so bright but dark in emotion were staring at her and though he was across the room, in front of the fridge to be exact, with the way his gaze was crushing her was like he was much closer. Shuichi always seemed to slip away from her memory despite his exotic and handsome looks, but she remembered this man very well.

She remembered his long tied back black hair, his simple clothing and the blue-tinted tribal tattoos. Even at the restaurant his mere presence had the hair at the back of her neck standing on end. He was dangerous.  
"Nice tattoos," she said lamely and for a moment she thought that he was going to start laughing –his eyes beginning to brighten and his mouth twitching up, but instead he narrowed his eyes and went back to eating a slab of steak -quite aggressively.

Sam stared in repulsion for only a moment longer before ignoring him and the nasty sounds he was making, and continuing her journey to the bathroom. Once she walked passed him the noise stopped, but she thought she heard him muttering something. She brushed it off and went on with her business. She didn't have time for men no matter how sexy they were. Besides, after her last relationship she decided that she was going to stay away from guys that were tall, dark, and an asshole. Been there, done that.

Once she finally caught her breath and put her mask tightly in place she headed back outside. She stood in front of the glass door, watching the kids playing carelessly for a moment before turning her attention to where the adults were grouped. They were all sitting in a circle, obviously deep in discussion. The man that didn't know how to converse and eat a steak properly looked a little peeved, and had his back slightly to the group.

Shizuru hit him in the arm, obviously trying to get his attention.

Sam couldn't help but wish that she could read lips because they looked very heated. Even sweet Yukina looked frustrated but her anger was obviously directed at Shuichi and Shizuru. What could they be talking about?

Sam sighed and opened the door, making sure to make more noise than necessary so they would know that she was there. She may have been curious but she wasn't nosy. There were things that she liked to keep to herself. She understood privacy.

"Good, you're back. Now we can eat!" Kazuma cheered, but Sam didn't miss the thoughtful look he gave her.

Did she do something that she wasn't aware of?

"I'm sorry to be an inconvenient," she joked with her small smile carefully in place.

"Nah, no need to be sorry. I actually need to slow down on the burgers," Kazuma said as he patted his rounding belly.

"Sam, this is Yusuke Urameshi. He's not as bad as he looks," Yukina said as she got up to follow her husband. He was already at the long white table that was covered with food.

Sam looked up so she could meet Yusuke's dark gaze with distaste.

"I'm sure," she mumbled before brushing past him and following Yukina. She couldn't help but feel the heat off of his body, the feeling making it hard to swallow, but she fought it off and played it cool. She could feel him watching her.

Once they all had made a plate and the kids were happily sitting at their own table, Sam made sure to sit away from Shuichi and Yusuke. When things make her uncomfortable she learned to stay away because there is usually a very good reason.

She chose a place at the very end of the table, Kazuma across from her, his older sister Shizuru next to Sam and Yukina next to her husband. Yusuke however had chosen to sit next to Yukina so Sam could see him clearly. Occasionally she could see him and Shuichi exchange a few words but he mainly stayed silent.

"Yukina told me that you live down the street," Kazuma said in-between bites of his second hamburger.

"I live at the end of the block."

"Cool, Urameshi lives on the next street over."

"Good for him," Sam muttered before putting a Lays chip in her mouth. The air was tense, like Kazuma was stepping on eggshells, but his smile was kind and encouraging.

"We all tried to stay close to one another. Shizuru and her husband live in the next neighborhood, as does

Shuichi," Yukina added, her smile soft despite the confidence in her eyes.

"You must have been friends for a long time," Sam said softly.

"We have been through a lot together, but we are all still the same people that we were despite the changes that age brought. It's only a matter of seeing the truth and overcoming the worst."

Sam's eyebrows rose. She stared at her coworker for a moment, wondering why she just said something that should have been in a fortune cookie. Somehow she felt that her statement was not directed at Sam. At the other end of the table Yusuke stood up, his plate falling over due to the abruptness of his movement.  
Everyone was silent as he walked away, his steps long and brisk as he muttered darkly to himself. The only thing Sam could catch was a bunch of F-bombs.

"Anyone want another burger?" Kazuma questioned but no one replied.


	3. Chapter 3

**Falling into Lust (Until I Fall into Love)**

**Thank you to LilCookie84 and pourquoibella for your wonderful reviews!**

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**Chapter three: Unwanted Hero**

"She's pregnant."

He couldn't believe what he was hearing. Keiko -his Keiko –was pregnant.

"I'm sorry Yusuke, but I don't want you to see her and freak-out. Her nightmares stopped. She is doing so well," Boton said gently, but Yusuke didn't dare look at her. She reminded him too much of whom he used to be. Boton was his past and he hated it when she dropped by.

Her mere presence always seemed to have a negative effect on him, and while he knew that it was not her fault, he just couldn't seem to stop it. Every time he was rude to her yet she never gave up on him. He didn't deserve someone like that.

"She is well now, much more stable. You did the right thing by letting her walk out that door Yusuke. I have never seen her so happy."

Was that supposed to make him feel better? To hear that the one person he loved was happier without him? It was always known that he and Keiko would end up together, even when they didn't know it themselves but...it didn't end the way everyone thought and it killed Yusuke to hear that she didn't miss him. Boton might as well be stabbing him in the heart with a knife...

"Yusuke…"

"Boton," he snapped -his voice dark and sharp, "Please, just shut the hell up."

She did, her mouth snapping closed as tears fell from her eyes as they always did when he snapped at her. She sighed before muttering a goodbye and flying away on her ore. He had a feeling that Boton wasn't going to come back around this time. He had officially pushed her away just like Keiko, and it was only a matter of time before everyone else left him behind to.

Yusuke didn't mean to be so cruel, but something inside of him changed and with that change came a whole new man. He couldn't stand himself at times, and he didn't see how anyone else could stand him either.

He was always moping, drinking and passing out. There were even times when he would wake up in the middle of the woods with no memory of how he got there. He felt like he was falling apart and there was no one who could save him. He was a sinking ship.

He sighed as he put his head in his hands, breathing deeply so he could get his anger in check. The only reason why he was allowed to stay in Human World was because he had assured Koenma that he was fine -he was anything but. He was a mess and a ticking time-bomb.

He screamed; his voice full of his pain before he bawled up his fist and hit the wall, creating a hole the size of a watermelon though he held back as much strength as he could. He closed his eyes, his breathing deep and unsteady before standing up from his messy bed and heading for the door. He needed a nice long walk.

Lately he has felt trapped, and with his friends constantly pulling him in different directions, it only made his emotions that much more unbearable. He knew that each of them only wanted to help, but they were making it worst. He just wanted to be alone and drink sake until he forgot his name.

The sky was black –the streets emptying as they slowly became more dangerous. He didn't have to worry about what he might face when he roamed at late hours. Even when he should have worried he was never afraid.

As a kid he was always roaming the streets which were how he had learned to fight. He would get his ass kicked by grown men, some of them being his mothers "boyfriends" and fighting became a necessity. He refused to be some jackass's punching bag while his mother was passed out drunk.

No, he was never afraid, but that was because he had to lean how to become tough and fearless. Keiko didn't understand though he knew that she tried. He never explained his thoughts and feelings to her. He never explained them to anyone.

He would be lying if he said that he selflessly let her walk out of the door. In his own sick and twisted way he was hoping that she would come back. Yusuke couldn't imagine his life without Keiko -he never could imagine her walking out on him. Out of everyone in the world he always knew that Keiko wouldn't turn her back on him, no matter what he did or became.

He was wrong.

When she couldn't take it anymore she left him alone and the worst part was that he allowed it to happen. Everything was his fault and even now after three years he was still being selfish. She finally found happiness and is getting everything that she wanted and he was angery at HER for it. He was angry at her for being happy when a day didn't go by that he didn't miss her.

He was such a jerk. Why couldn't he just let go?

He slowed down as he approached a small white and gray diner that was across the street. _Why would I come here of all places?_ Yusuke thought to himself, but he didn't continue passed it.

Sam, why was he thinking of her all of a sudden? Her mere name pushed aside his thoughts of Keiko and slowly the stabbing pain in his heart became a dull pinch.

For a moment he just stood there, his mind slowly easing though he tried to keep it from happening. He tried to remember Keiko, his love for her, everything that they went through but it just wouldn't stick.

Yeah, Sam was hot, but he couldn't figure out why his feet had led him here. Why was it that she has been randomly popping up in his mind lately, and when she is near his thoughts of Keiko are pushed to the back of his mind?

At the diner and at Jayden's party Yusuke found that he didn't think of Keiko once. Instead she was replaced by his attraction for Sam. When she wasn't around Yusuke hated it but when she was around...he felt things that he hadn't felt in a long time.

It wasn't love but it was powerful, and it took away the ache in his heart.

Through the window he could see her wave to the people by the door before exiting the building, a light bag swung over her shoulder as she made her way towards the neighborhood.

The light from the streetlights seemed to reflect off of her golden hair as it trailed behind her, the breeze making her clutch her leather jacket closer. He watched her walk, the dull throbbing in his heart slowly numbing until he felt oddly content.

It didn't last long.

Yusuke narrowed his eyes as three men ran out of the darkness –following her without her noticing. The men looked familiar and soon his anger was back but for different reasons.

Before even thinking twice Yusuke jogged across the street, muttering darkly to himself at the clique situation.

~~~W~~~W~~~

She couldn't help the muffled cry that escaped as a large hand covered her mouth and something hard hit her back. She closed her eyes in pain, accidentally allowing the man to drag her body into an ally as she tried to fight through the pain.

She was much too stunned to think clearly or else she would have known better than to give them what they wanted.

"You're not so tough now are you, you little bitch," the man hissed and his buddies laughed in amusement.

Sam quickly got a hold of herself and mentally smirked when she noticed that due to the man trying to keep her from yelling out, he only had one arm pinning her arms down which gave her a lot of leeway. She quickly kicked back as hard as she could. The man hissed in pain as he threw her away from him. She landed half on a black trash bag but the other half of her body landed on the cement.

She cried out as she drew in to herself, pain shooting throughout her whole body and making it hard to breathe.

She was no fool. It was easy to see that she was not only outnumbered but also out muscled. She be damned if she was going to let these poor excuses of men abuse her without any injuries in the process.

They were going to come at her all at once and she was going to fight as hard as she could. It would be pointless in the end, but at least she had to ability to wound them. It was like her past all over again...she just couldn't get away from it could she?

"Get her!" the man hollered as he bent down with his hands on his crotch. She hoped that the black boots she was wearing damaged him completely.

A large dark-skinned man turned towards her, a pocket knife gleaming silver as the moon peered down at it. Her breath caught in her throat as bad memories began to resurface and paralyze her. She had sworn that she would never allow a man to harm her again, but just like then she was freezing up in fear. It was pathetic, but her mind replacing this mans face with _his _no matter how many times she told herself that he was not him.

She fought to get away from her father only to put her faith in the wrong person. He was just like her bastard father and no matter how hard she tried she couldn't erase him from her mind.

He terrified her, haunted her, and in her fucked up mind he was out to punish her all over again, rage in his gray eyes and a wicked bone chilling smile making tears form in her eyes as she prepared for the inevitable...

Before the man could lay a single hand on her he was flying across the alleyway, his nose gushing blood as he lay knocked out against the stone wall. Sam was frozen, her eyes wide and her mind confused as she tried to figure out what just happened.

"Are you okay?"

She jumped as she turned her head slightly. Mr. Asshole was standing casually with his hands in his pockets and a self-righteous grin on his face. His eyes were a bright golden brown and were full of excitement. He looked almost like a totally different man.

"Who are you?" the man that she had kicked in the crotch yelled, a knife clenched in his hands.

"Hey, aren't you the guy that was causing trouble at the diner a few nights ago?" Yusuke asked as he began to crack his knuckles.

Now Sam recognized him.

She didn't really notice that he had black hair and blue eyes; all she saw was that a man was messing with her sister. He wanted pay back for humiliating him and decided to jump her and do god knows what.

She felt her heart drop as she examined him closer...He looked awfully familiar and she prayed to whoever was listening that she was wrong; that she was just out of it and thinking nonsense.

"I won't feel guilty about kicking your ass you know. Nothing pisses me off more than grown men who try to take advantage of females," and then his face became darker though his arrogant smile was still in place.

"Kick my ass?" the man yelled, but fear was apparent by the look on his face as he glanced at the knocked out man whose nose was still oozing blood.

"Can you move? This might get ugly."

But he didn't even wait for her to respond. Instead he dashed forward, his movements so fast that she could barely keep up. The man screeched out when Yusuke grabbed his arm –bending it backwards and breaking it without a sweat. Then with his other arm his punched the guy so hard that he flew off of his feet and landed right next to his friend, moaning in pain as he slumped down on the ground.

"Huh, guess the other guy decided that you weren't worth his ass getting handed to him," Yusuke mocked as he watched the guy disappear out of the alleyway, his feet carrying him as fast as they could despite his larger build.

He turned towards her, his eyes still bright and oddly soft. He seemed like such a pompous asshole but at the moment he seemed, while still rough around the edges, caring. She felt her heart jump, her body shake and her breathing quicken. This feeling to her was new, unheard of in her long life of hatred, anger, and fighting. She knew however that whatever she was feeling was nothing good because while he seemed different now, the next time they met he would be back to Mr. Asshole.

She pushed her earlier thoughts back as she tried to sit up, pain shooting through her back and causing her to gasp in pain though she still kept trying. She was a bit stubborn and always seemed to pay for her choices later on -Mainly because she always made the wrong choice.

She sighed, briefly wondering why she just couldn't handle things the way other people did. Why couldn't she just be like other females?

"Let's get you home," he said softly, his deep baritone voice smooth compared the rough quality she had been hearing up until now.

He bent down in front of her, his eyes examining her for wounds before he gently wrapped his arms around her and lifted her up. She hissed, her hands clutching his tee-shirt tightly.

"Your back?" he asked tenderly as he adjusted her so his arm avoided her lower back, which seemed to be the center point of her pain.

"Yes," she breathed lightly as he began to walk slowly, mindful of his movements.

They fell into a comfortable silence and she couldn't help but to breathe in his musky scent. He was all man, and she found it be extremely attractive. He was like nothing she had ever seen before and his mood swings only added to her confusion. Was he only acting like this because she was hurt?

"Which house?"

She closed her eyes as the deep rumble in his chest washed over her. His voice was so deep and dark that she couldn't help the effect it had on her. Her infatuation was dangerous but she always had a weakness for danger.

Maybe that was why she always put herself in bad situations.

"The small yellow one with the vampire garden gnome in the front," she said quietly.

A boisterous laugh erupted from him, making his chest vibrate as he looked at the gnome that had cheesy vampire teeth and a black cape.

"I named him Killer," she said quietly as she turned her head from his chest so she could look at her gnome. Hailey gave it to her last year for Christmas as a joke.

Yusuke chuckled once more before walking up her porch steps smoothly, and then setting her gently on her feet. The moment her feet touched the ground she began to crumble, her back making it hard for her to stand upright without overbearing pain.

"Whoa, maybe we should take a look at that," he said as he wrapped his arms around her for support.

"I'm fine. You've done enough," she whispered, not understanding why he was still bothering with her. She figured that he would be gone by now.

He moved her over to the bench beside her front door, and then crouched down so that they were eye to eye. His hand started to move up the back of her shirt, his fingers brushing her skin and causing her to take in air. He moved his eyes to hers. The look in them had her heart pounding as he continued to slowly feel the skin.

She felt unbearably hot with him so close to her, and his eyes were full of a fire that went straight to her core. What they felt for one another was lust, but it was strong enough to make her feel weak.

The moment he broke eye contact she let out a shaky breath. What was wrong with her?

"It looks like he punched you. You're bruised but nothing is damaged," he said casually before pulling his hand from her shirt and standing up to his full height.

She looked up at him, her eyes no doubt holding her conflict though his were back to being empty. He was staring off into the distance with his hands in his pockets, acting almost as if she wasn't even there.

Was she imagining the longing, passion filled look that promised dirty, unspeakable things? Was she imagining the tenderness of which his rough hands handled her? What was it that he was trying to do? Why would he act like an ass, save her, and then act like an ass again?

Why did she even care when she knew it was going to happen? He was just some exotic eye-candy for her to occasionally look at, nothing more, so the feelings inside of her were unnecessary.

"Do you need help getting inside?" he asked, but there was no kindness in his voice. For some reason it hurt her worst than her back.

He was giving her comfort and easing her mind from the things that always seemed to creep back at random times, but now that comfort was gone, right along with his caring attitude.

"No," she said sharply, "thanks for showing up at the last second. Now leave."

Her tone of voice was no doubt more hostile than she intended, but unease was making it hard to breathe. She wanted to reach out to him, to tell him to stay but she had a little something called pride.

How she hated her god damned pride.

He turned towards her slightly, his eyes peering at her remotely before nodding and turning his back to her. For a moment he stood there, his hair blowing in the night breeze and looking like a shadow in the dim lighting before he jumped smoothly off of the porch.

She watched as he walked away, his large form slowly being engulfed by the shadows as he went. She couldn't help but wonder why he hesitated. She had the feeling like he wanted to tell her something and for a moment...she was hoping that he was going to stay just a little bit longer despite her crude words.

She sighed before leaning back and closing her eyes. She didn't feel like trying to move at the moment.


	4. Chapter 4

**Falling Into Lust (Until I Fall Into Love)  
Thank you to LilCookie84 and pourquoibella for your beautiful and well appreciated reviews =] I hope you like the chapter and the development that takes place.**

* * *

**Chapter four: Moving on**

His eyes no doubt showed his heartbreak. She was smiling as a tall brown-haired man touched her growing stomach gently. Keiko looked so happy that it nearly brought Yusuke down to his knees. He had never seen her smile so wide. He had never seen so much light fill her eyes. He had never seen her look so beautiful.

"I'm such a selfish jackass," he murmured as he ran a hand through his loose and unruly hair.

He sighed, taking one last look at the couple standing in front of the noddle shop before turning around and walking away. Lately it feels like that is all he has been doing; walking away -walking away from Keiko, his friends…Sam.

He fought the growl as he shook his head rapidly. He could never put her through the crap that he put Keiko through. Very little was keeping him in the Human World, but he didn't want to go to Demon World either. He didn't know what he wanted, and as simple as his mind may be at times he could see that Sam was already going through enough. She didn't need his crap intermingling with hers.

When Yusuke first saw her she was tough and smooth in her actions, but when he saved her from those three men she seemed so vulnerable. He frowned as he remembered her wide eyes that were desperately holding back tears. He didn't like that face on her. Not when she had seemed so unshakable.

But that showed him just how breakable she was...would she be able to handle even just a night with him? The idea of being with Sam, even in just a casual since had something in his chest tighten. There was just something about her...

"Urameshi!"

Yusuke stopped walking as he turned towards the loud voice that was obnoxiously screaming his name.

"Shut the hell up Kuwabara. You're making people stare," Yusuke said moodily as he watched Kuwabara and Yukina approach him. Jayden was holding her father's hand, her dark red eyes looking around in wonder at all the people rushing to get to work. It was hard to imagine that her uncle was Hiei. She was so gentle and hardly ever said a word. Actually that last part sounded a lot like Hiei...

For a brief moment the ex Spirit Detective wondered how the fire demon was doing and what he had been up to after all of these years. Knowing Hiei he was scaring the hell out of Mukuro's minions every chance he has.

"I'm surprised to see you out and about," Kuwabara said as he clapped Yusuke on the back.

"Yeah," he mumbled as he shoved his hands in his pockets -a light frown on his face as he looked back towards the direction he had come from.

"We were just heading home. Perhaps you would like to join us for lunch?"

Kuwabara didn't notice, but Yusuke couldn't help but see the demanding look in Yukina's eyes. They were darker than normal and almost as calculating as Hiei's when he was examining an opponent...right before he imbedded his sword in their chest.

"Nah. Maybe some other time."

Her eyes narrowed dangerously.

"Or now," he added quickly as they all began to walk again, but Yusuke stayed away from the small ice demoness. She was more intimidating than her brother when she wanted to be.

They arrived at the house and took their usual places in the backyard. Jayden went off to play, and Kuwabara was getting the grill ready for hotdogs and hamburgers. Yusuke watched Yukina who was in a white lawn chair across from him. He half expected her to elongate her fangs and nails and then pounce on him, ripping out his insides as she went into a blood frenzy.

"Sam told me what happened," she finally said -her voice oddly hard and unlike the Yukina he had come to know.

Yusuke's eyes went blank of emotion, "Did she?"

"Yes," Yukina said slowly, "and you should know that I don't believe in what Kurama is doing. I understand his point, but he's not right either. There is no reason why you can't be with a human. Look at me and Kuwabara."

"You and Kuwabara are different Yukina. He is not a normal human."

She frowned, "You know as well as I do that while he can still can sense spirits he can no longer use spirit energy to fight. He has gone too long without it."

"Look, you saw what happened with Keiko," he said darkly.

Tears were in Yukina's eyes as she fell silent, her head bobbing up in down in agreement. The situation was hard for her considering that Keiko was her best friend. She had witnessed Keiko struggle until she gave out. She had soothed Keiko when nightmares would take over –her fear of dying before Yusuke haunting her to the point of insanity. It was Yukina who had kept her together for so many years.

When the breaking point came, Yukina had to give Keiko up for fear that her appearance would only send her first real friend back into depression. It was very hard on the ice-maiden.

"Yes, I did see what happened with Keiko but she was never right for you Yusuke. You were always so different from each other but too in-love to care. You couldn't give her what she needed and she wasn't strong enough to handle everything that a relationship with you comes with."

"Then who is Yukina?" Yusuke yelled, but Yukina did not flinch.

"That's for you to decide." she said smoothly, "Demons are different. We don't choose the people we fall in-love with, only the people we fall in-lust with. Your human side loved Keiko but not your demon side. That was why you slowly became more distant towards her. Did you not realize Yusuke, that as you became more of a demon your feelings for Keiko shifted?"

Yusuke realized that in his sudden anger he had stood up, and slowly he sat back down while unclenching his fist.

"What," Yusuke said slowly, "the hell are you talking about?"

Yukina smiled, "You may have some changes due to your demon side becoming dominate, but you're still the same impatient, oblivious Yusuke."

"Lunch is done!" Kuwabara called, and with one last encouraging smile Yukina stood up and left Yusuke alone.

He turned over the conversation in his head, his eyes deep with his thoughts as he came to a realization.

Everyone had moved on; everyone but him. He missed when he was a kid and always had death trailing close behind him but he was too stupid to care or notice. He missed Genkia, and fighting, and never knowing if he was going to come out alive. He missed his old life.

Keiko was all he had left from that point in time. It wasn't her that he was holding on to. It was everything that she represents. Yes he loved her -loves her- but the only reason why he couldn't let go was because then that would mean letting go of the past and accepting the future...a future without her to remind him who he is deep down.

"Are you getting something to eat Urameshi?"

Yusuke snapped out of his thoughts as he abruptly stood up. Without answering Kuwabara or even glancing at the couple to his left he began to jog, feeling something he hadn't felt in a long time -Anxious. He wasn't sure why but he knew what he had to do if he was going to overcome his fears and doubts. He wasn't sure about falling in love, but a new friendship with someone from the outside...maybe it could help him let go.

But only if she were willing, and that was the part that made him anxious.

He slowed as the diner came into view -his nerves making him twitch and his chest tighten as he watched from across the street. He couldn't see her but he knew she was there. A mixture between grass and lavender gave away her presence.

He began to walk across the street, not even paying attention to the cars that passed as he went. He opened the door, the bell telling of his entrance as he looked around at the few families occupying the room.

It was rather empty for a Saturday morning, and suddenly he was unsure of what he was doing. For the first time in years he was being impulsive.

"What do you want?"

He raised an eyebrow as he turned towards the rather angry voice.

"What has you so pissy?" he asked before he even realized he spoke.

Her eyes narrowed as her cheeks became red in her aggravation.

"It's been a week since you so honorably saved me," she said sarcastically, "I was hoping that would be the last time we would run into each other."

Despite her obvious hostility he couldn't help but admire her appearance. She wasn't dolled up; actually it looked like she just rolled out of bed, but it didn't take away from her appeal.

Just one glance at her luscious body and he found desire taking over -his demon fighting to escape and have its way. Her lips were plump, her face soft and it has been awhile since he had been attracted to someone. He shifted slightly.

"Let me make it up to you. Lunch?" he said smoothly as he kept his eyes on hers.

He smirked lightly when her angry look wavered.

"I'm an asshole but I'm not only an asshole," he added as he motioned towards the table she was standing in front of.

She glanced at the table and then at him before scoffing and plopping down ungracefully though Yusuke still found it to be attractive. He fought the laugh that was stirring in his throat as he sat across from her. She said nothing, only glared and he couldn't help but smirk once more at her obvious annoyed look.

"Stop smirking," she hissed.

"Stop glaring," he counteracted teasingly.

Her face became even redder as she fought for control.

"Hello, what may I get you two kids today?"

Yusuke didn't move his eyes from Sam as he said, "A coke and the streak and fries combo -Medium rare."

"What about you sis? The usual chicken salad?"

"Yes, thanks Hailey."

"You're welcome," Hailey said as she wrote everything down in a purple notepad before walking away.

"Are you going to eat the streak like a barbarian?" Sam taunted once the younger girl was out of earshot. Oddly enough she seemed like she was only teasing him.

"I might," he said casually as an easy smile found its way to his lips.

She blinked a few times, taken back by his attitude. Yusuke himself was shocked by how he was acting. He felt…like Yusuke Urameshi instead of like a stranger. When he saw Keiko happy with his own two eyes he realized that he wanted to be happy to. He still missed her, but that didn't mean that he had to be miserable.

It was time to make a change.

"Why the sudden change in attitude?" she asked softly though her icy eyes were hard and calculating.

For a moment she reminded him of Kurama. If her eyes were green then it would match perfectly.

"I guess you deserve some sort of explanation," he said as he leaned towards her slightly. Her eyes went wide as she backed up, obviously uncomfortable with his close proximity.

"I have been going through some crap and am just now pulling myself out of all the bullshit."

Sam's eyebrows furrowed, "What kind of bullshit? The kind that has something to do with a female I'm guessing?"

"Yup," Yusuke said as he leaned back while putting his hands behind his head.

There was something about being in her presence that relaxed him, and for the first time since he met her he wasn't fighting the natural sedation she gave him. Instead he allowed himself to smell her scent until it made him slightly light-headed.

Sam watched him for a moment before nodding stiffly, "Relationships cause more harm than good."

If Sam didn't have his attention she surly did now.

"Why do you say that?"

She huffed slightly, "It always ends with goodbye and very rarely do both people walk away unscratched. The one person you choose to tell all of your secrets to ends up using all of your weaknesses against you as they try to morph you so that they can be happy. It's fucking stupid."

Both of Yusuke's eyebrows were raised in his surprise...half of it due to her vulgar way of saying it.

"So…you don't believe in fairy-tales, happy endings, together forever, blah, blah, blah?" he questioned quietly.

She then laughed but it was bitter and dry.

"No. I have no reason to believe in things like that."

"Than what do you believe in?"

She met his eye, "I believe that it's about whether the pain is worth it."

"And if it's not?"

"Then cut your losses and never look back."

Yusuke fell silent as they both stared at one another. He was taken back by the brutality of what she was saying. For so long he had felt the same way and he used to think that Keiko was worth the pain, but if he had known that it would end the way it did than he would have never gotten involved. Their relationship did more harm than good –no matter how much they loved each other.

He used to think that if anyone understood him it was Keiko –they had grown up together! But as years went by he saw that she was unwilling to learn who he was becoming, hence their terrible separation.

They felt like they HAD to be together when really they should have walked away. Yusuke only felt guilt and blame for how things ended.

"You must have been through some serious heartbreak," Yusuke said knowingly, his eyes shadowing over with the memories that made his own heart as bitter and cold and she looked.

She looked away, her eyes stricken for a moment before she nodded and said, "I just learned the reality of things."

"It seems to me that it's still raw."

She glanced over at Yusuke for a moment.

"I'm moving on," she said as she suddenly stood up and put her hands in her shorts pockets, "Look, I'm sorry to bail but I…need to go. If you want to go I'll tell Hailey to not bother with the food."

Yusuke nodded slightly and watched as she stiffly walked away and into the back.

He stood up; frowning in annoyance as he swiftly exited the diner. What the fuck now?

_Can't a guy do something for himself instead of being scolded like a kid?_

"What are you doing Yusuke?"

Kurama was holding a bag of grocery's, his eyes narrowed in worry as they flickered from Yusuke to inside of the diner. His face had a strange kind of quality to it that Yusuke hadn't seen before. He looked conflicted.

Yusuke knew what he was thinking. He was a demon and she was a human – a relationship would only cause pain and Yusuke should go to the Demon World, and while that will happen someday he still felt attached to the Human World. He couldn't leave yet. Did that mean he had to be alone until then?

No, and dammit he was done trying to separate himself from everything! Unlike Kurama he didn't have 3000 years to come to terms with it.

One of the many things that he just couldn't understand about his fox friend was that he had all of those women falling over his feet and yet...he didn't want any of them. Didn't he ever get lonely? Doesn't he find himself wanting the company of a female instead of working and sitting home alone? Yusuke knows how that feels and it's not pleasant.

"I'm moving on," Yusuke said as he brushed past his friend without looking back.

"Please, don't be foolish Yusuke," Kurama called out but Yusuke kept walking, not even giving a thought as to why Kurama was near the diner when the grocery store was closer to his own house.


	5. Chapter 5

**Falling into Lust (Until I Fall into Love)**

** Chapter five: Closer**  
Once again it was late at night and Yusuke was walking around the neighborhood. Each time he passed by the yellow house his chest would tighten. He had a bad feeling and he just couldn't seem to shake it off.

It had been a few week since he last saw Sam at the diner. He found that –with just one little conversation with her – he felt closer to the real Yusuke than he has in years. Even Kuwabara noticed when Yusuke stopped by and played with Jayden for half-an-hour. He hadn't done that since Keiko left him.

And now when he thinks of her his heart doesn't feel like its rotting in his chest. She is a quick thought, a passing remembrance, before she is gone and his mind fills up with icy blue eyes. He just can't wrap his head around Sam. She's cold, she's hot, she's not a scared little girl and yet it's obvious that she has felt a lot of pain. She is strong but it almost seems like it is forced –like she has to be strong.

Would she be able to handle him and all of his bullshit? Would she be able to able even a casual relationship?

His 4th time passing the house he finally gave in to his desire to get a closer look. Usually when he felt something was off it was and it was typically messy. He would never forgive himself if his selfish desire to get closer to Sam got her hurt.

She was already so…wounded.

"Stop!"

Yusuke froze, his eyes becoming wide as her voice washed over his keen ears. She sounded hysterical –scared –hurt.  
He slammed against the door, not even bothering to see if it was unlocked. The living room was trashed beyond belief, everything broken and ripped up to the point of being unrecognizable.

He ran upstairs where the screaming was coming from, and within seconds he through himself at the bedroom door. The sight before him had him growling malevolently. In the blink of an eye he was across the room, a clawed hand around the blonde mans throat that was in the process of choking Sam small from. She was covered in blood and half-naked. He had her pinned to her very own bed.

"How dare you, you asshole!" he roared as he grabbed the hand around Sam's bruised throat and snapped it backwards.

The man screamed but Yusuke didn't care. He was seeing red and his demon side felt closer than ever.

He tossed the man effortlessly across the room, a small dark smile playing on his lips as the man slumped to the floor, blood pooling out of his mouth in streams. He went in for the kill, his mouth watering in anticipation…

"Stop it, Yusuke. Stop it!"

He froze, his body shaking in anger as his demon energy threatened to escape and destroy his enemy, along with the world.

"Please!"

He took a deep breath but the shaking remained.

"You really want this bastard to live?" he growled deeply, his voice struggling to get out the words eligibly.

"No," she said softly, "I want nothing more than to watch him drown in his own blood."

Yusuke turned around, a little bit of himself coming through due to the impact of her words. All of the females he was use to were forgiving, loving, always wanting to make nice. Sam however looked like she was ready for blood, even with the purple sheet wrapped around her.

"But I don't have the guts to kill him," she continued, "so I'm going to let him rot in prison. Not only did he violate a restraining order, but he already has a history of hurting woman. He won't be seeing the Sun for a while. At least this way he will suffer."

It was obvious that she wasn't a very forgiving person.

It didn't take long for the police to get there. They barely spoke to one another, Sam telling the cops what happened and Yusuke staying silent. He always hated cops and it didn't help that some of them were kids that he used to beat up on a daily basis. The dirty looks were really starting to piss him off.

It wasn't surprising to hear that the guy was an ex boyfriend who is apart of a serious gang, which the men in the alleyway happened to be apart of. It was surprising however to find that Sam used to be apart of it to- against her own will of course. That explained her interesting outlook on life and how she knew how to fight a little bit. For a normal human she is dangerous to be around.

She must have been thinking the same thing, because when the police left she looked him straight in the eye and said, "Leave."

Yusuke straightened to his full height and peered down at her. She was so small compared to him yet she wasn't afraid. Most humans felt uncomfortable around him yet she didn't seem to care. Even Keiko became afraid and she grew up with him.

"You're not staying here alone. You said you're sister was on a trip with her boyfriends family, and I'm not going to leave you here by yourself with no doors."

She took a step back, obviously not believing what she was hearing. He didn't blame her. He did leave her out on her porch when she could barely walk. The desires she caused in him may have made him run away that time,but he wasn't going to leave her alone this time. She was putting on a brave face, but he saw the tears that were threatening to seep through.

"I'm dangerous to be around," she said blandly, almost like the words were bitter on her tongue.

Yusuke threw his head back and laughed -the sound loud and highly amused before he quickly sobered and said forebodingly, "And I'm more dangerous to be around."

He walked passed her and went right into her destroyed living room. He heard her come in from behind him, but he was assessing the damage and seeing what could be saved and what couldn't. The only thing that was untouched was the picture of her sister smiling proudly in her cap and gown.

"You're different," she stated softly.

Yusuke stiffened before turning towards her. She was standing in the ruined doorway, a pair of blue shorts and a large white tee-shirt exposing most of her cuts and bruises. She looked vulnerable, but she stood tall and unashamed.

"How so?" he asked mildly as he put his hands in the front pockets of his jeans.

He was hoping she didn't notice, but the observant look in her eyes told him that she noticed every single detail that proved he was different from everyone else.

"You threw Jason like he was nothing and snapped his wrist. Those guys in the alleyway –they had no chance against you, and you tossed that huge guy around like a rag doll," she said, her voice becoming louder as she threw up her arms in a wild reenactment. The sight would have been funny any other time.

"Do I scare you?" he asked sardonically.

How could he not scare her? His demon side was almost released right in front of her. He should have known better. Maybe Kurama was right…

"Should I be?" she asked questioningly as she tilted her said to the side, "The way I see it is you keep saving me even though I would rather you not. Whatever it is that makes you different, you use it to help people. That's all I need to know."

Yusuke scoffed as he looked her up and down, trying to see if maybe she had a serious injury that knocked a few screws loose. He was expecting her to scream and yell and call him a monster. The fact that she didn't confused him. She wasn't even asking questions. She just…accepted it.

"Now, I'm wide awake so I might as well get started on cleaning this crap up. Are you going to keep staring at me like I'm insane or are you going to help?" and then she smiled.

It was small but it was the first genuine smile he had seen her do. It was sweet and made his chest tightened at the amount of innocence it showed. She was attractive, even with the bruises.

Yusuke didn't say anything but instead picked up the ripped up couch, not bothering to hide his strength. She already expected that he was different, though he doubted she knew how much, and he saw no point in hiding the fact that he was strong from her. It bothered him that she wasn't playing 20 questions; that she was wasn't demanding answers or screaming for him to leave. It was her that was different. He had never met a woman quite like her. Even after all the shit she just went through she refused to cry and instead put her pain into cleaning.

He found that he only wanted to know her more the longer he was around her.

The night seemed to pass by quickly as they worked in companionable silence. He couldn't help but compare this moment to his moment with Keiko. She couldn't stand the silence but Sam –she seemed like she enjoyed it, her slight humming soothing him even though it was off pitch. It sounded like a screwed up version of "Mary Had a Little Lamb", and a couple of times it had him chuckling silently.

He was starting to think that she was doing it on purpose due to the looks she would give him every now and again. Who would have thought that she had a sense of humor?

By the time the Sun reached its peak in the sky, the living room was bare. It was a depressing sight, but all Sam did was sigh before she turned to Yusuke and said, "I always hated these peach colored walls. It's fucking ugly, but Hailey insisted." And then she smiled wickedly, "Would you like to be my partner in crime?"

Yusuke couldn't help it. He chuckled before saying, "Hell yeah. But if you're too tired than I understand."

He was teasing her, they were teasing each other. Somewhere in their silence they became closer to one another instead of them both pushing each other away. Maybe Kurama was wrong after all.

"Follow me," she said lightly before walking through the kitchen which was oddly untouched. It was small, but well used despite no dishes being in the sink. She obviously liked to keep a clean house.

She opened the pantry and bent down, her shorts not hiding much of anything. Yusuke took a shuttered breath, but stared regardless. The only thing that stopped him from reaching out and groping her was the fact that she just went through something traumatic. She was calm now, but he didn't want to set her off. Good thing he wasn't as impulsive as he used to be.

"Ah, here we go," she cheered as she picked up a silver paint can, "Shit, I don't have any brushes."

"I need to get you some new doors anyway," Yusuke said casually though inside he was fighting to not rip off her clothes and have his way. Being a demon he found that he was becoming very instinctual. Right now his instincts wanted the both of them to be naked. He could probably use a moment to himself.

"Let me go up stairs and get some money," she said as she sat the can down.

"Nah, I busted them down so it's the least I can do."

She narrowed her eyes and nodded, "Good point. You better not get me some cheap-oh doors. I want the good stuff."

He laughed as he turned around. "Whatever," he said before leaving.

~~W~~W~~W~~

Slowly her eyes opened and for a moment she was disoriented. Her body hurt, her head hurt, her throat was on fire. Over all she felt like crap. She groaned before rolling out of bed, her muscles tight and making her move slowly as she exited Hailey's pink and blue decorated room. She kept her eyes to the floor, her breathing deep and slow as she entered the living room.

How was it that she ended up in Hailey's room in the first place? The last thing she remembered was lying on the floor, her mind busy with ten-million thoughts as the breeze blew in from her doorway...

She froze as a strange scent entered her nose. Slowly she looked up. Her hand lifting to cover her mouth as she let her eyes roam over the fresh paint on her walls. Deep red –it was so beautiful to her. Like each wall was a rose petal.

Whoever had painted it took extra care because there was hardly any on the roof. It was flawless.

She turned around –another surprise! She no longer had a gaping doorway. There was a strong white door there instead. Her hand fell from her mouth as she took one last look at the room, completely confused and overwhelmed.

"Yusuke, you just had to do something sweet didn't you?" she whispered softly as she sunk down to the floor. She put her head in her hands and began to cry, finally letting out the years of pain and abuse that she suffered throughout the years.

This was the first time she had cried since she was a child.

And that was the first time she allowed herself to feel.


	6. Chapter 6

**Falling into Lust (Until I Fall into Love)**

Thank you twice to LilCookie84 and pourquoibella for leaving me beautiful comments on the last two chapters. You guys seriously rock, and when I update it's for you =] enjoy!

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**Chapter six: The Meeting  
**

He awakened with the Sun for the first time in years. He looked around his room, frowning in displeasure as he examined the hole in the wall, the disgusting and smelly bed sheets, and all the sake bottles lying around. He was drinking himself numb, but now he only felt shame by how far he had fallen. He understood now why his friends watched him as closely as they did. He was slowly becoming an alcoholic, his demon blood not able to stop his need to purge himself in the bitter, mouth burning liquid.

He use to always swear that he wouldn't end up like his mom, but if he didn't stop now than he would be much worst off. He had a lot of cleaning up to do.

With only baggy jeans on and a black trash bag in one hand, he began to pick up the bottles –every now and again finding dirty, stained clothes which he threw in the washing machine. Once he could see that his carpet was light brown, he stripped his bed and placed all of its contents in the laundry room.

He opened the window so that the smell of musk and sweat could leave the room, his nose wrinkling slightly as the smell began to get to him. How did he live so long like this? Was he do depressed that he couldn't tell that it smelt like a wet dog that drank too much liquor?

When his house was as clean as he could get it, he stood in front of the hole in his wall with a frustrated expression. It was deep and would need to be filled before he could do anything else. That he would have to fix later when he he the supplied. He sighed as he sat on his bare bed and slowly reached over and opened the top draw of the wooden table beside the bed.

The only thing inside of it was a photo album -_The_ photo album.

Since the beginning of his Spirit Detective days Keiko would randomly take pictures, though none of them really knew due to their own distractions. He opened the plain black book and felt his heart drop as he looked at the first set of pictures. They were mainly of him at school. He was either asleep or arguing with Kuwabara. He missed their usual fights.

He skipped the next few pages, not wanting to look at how happy he used to be when he was young and stupid. No, he wanted to see himself fall apart. He wanted to see what Keiko saw.

He froze.

He was looking away from the camera, his eyes hard and cold as he stared off into the distance. One arm was around Keiko and the other was in his pocket, his fist obviously clenched in his irritation.

Keiko was looking at the camera, her brown eyes staring right into his very being. They use to be so large and bright, but in the picture they looked heavy and clouded. Tears were prickling at her eyes and it was obvious that she was holding her breath, trying desperately to hide her weariness and depression behind a wide, fake smile. Under her eyes were pitch black circles, evidence that she had not been sleeping.

Yusuke couldn't believe it. How could this be the two kids who fell in-love and stayed by each other through thick and thin? How had it all gone wrong? How did he not noticed what he had done to her?

"Keiko, I'm so sorry," he whispered as he reached out a large shaky hand to the picture.

He removed it from the album, his eyes darting back and forth from his ice-cold eyes to her vulnerable face. He went to flip the picture over, unable to stare at her stricken face any longer, but paused when he saw writing on the back. It was Keiko's handwriting, he could tell by the delicate curving, but it looked like her hands were shaking while she was writing it. He took a deep breath as he slowly read the words that were written right before she left him.

_Yusuke, _

_ I know you won't be seeing this picture for quite a while, but I know you. At some point you are going to want to see where everything went wrong. I'm falling apart Yusuke. You have become so cold and angry. I know you miss the past and feel trapped. I know you miss Genkia, you won't even speak about her and ever since she passed you haven't been the same. I don't know how to help you Yusuke and it's killing me. You're never home, you're always angry, and you won't even look at me. We're not the same kid's that we used to be, and that is why I have to leave you. We have no future, and I hope that by the time you bother to look through this album you will understand my decision. I want you to move on like I plan to, I want you to see that the kid I grew up with is still somewhere inside of you. You did it to yourself Yusuke. You're the one that snuffed out your impulsive, bright light that made me fall in-love with you._

_I hope that you will find me soon Yusuke. I still love you, and I always will no matter what becomes of us. Know that I will always be by your side, just not as your lover or wife._

_Love always and forever,_

_Keiko_  
**  
**He stared at the words, his eyes scanning the crooked handwriting over and over as he tried to process her words.

_I hope that you will find me soon Yusuke.  
_

It's been three years; would she still want to look at the man who put her through hell without a care for her own feelings?

_Know that I will always be by your side._

Would she still be, even after all of this time?

He tossed the album on his bed and grabbed a tee-shirt before heading towards the door. He didn't know where he was going, but he didn't have to. Regardless of where she went, Yusuke would always be able to find her. The people on the streets passed by in blurs, him barely noticing them as he walked swiftly. It seemed like forever before he slowed, his heart feeling like an anchor in his chest. He had ended up at a coffee shop and slowly he approached.

"It's about time."

Yusuke stiffened, but he knew that voice from anywhere. It wasn't that tired, empty voice that she used when they were married, no, she sounded like the Keiko he knew and loved. She sounded happy and light.

He turned around, his eyes no doubt showing every single emotion that he was feeling; forlorn, happy, apologetic, and too many other things for him to process.

She was smiling softly, her eyes gentle as the wind played with her long brown hair. She had one hand on her growing belly, her hand rubbing in circles as she waited for him to speak.

"Keiko," he whispered, not sure what to say to the woman that he had torn down without even realizing it.

Suddenly her smile widened, tears forming in her eyes as she shook her head side from side.

"You're back," she whispered before she threw herself at him.

She began to cry, as she held on as tight as her belly would allow. Yusuke closed his eyes and wrapped his arms gently around her, tears forming in his own eyes though he didn't allow them to fall. He had done enough crying; now it's her turn.

"I'm so sorry Keiko. I'm so sorry," he breathed out as he stroked her hair gently. How could he have gone so long without Keiko? She was his best friend. He needed her.

Her sobbing began to lighten and slowly she let go of him and craned her neck so she could see his face.

"I've been waiting for you. You took longer than I expected."

Yusuke smiled sadly, wiping away another falling tear with a gentle thumb. "I know."

"Regardless, I'm glad that you're back. I was worried that you wouldn't come and find me," she said wretchedly as tears began to fall once more.

Yusuke smiled softly. "I will always be by your side, just not as your lover or husband," he said as he brushed away a stray hair that had fallen into her eyes.

"I'm happy to hear that," she whispered softly, obviously remembering that she had said the same thing on the back of their last photo together.

They were silent for a while, both of them gazing at one another, afraid that if they looked away the other one would disappear. Yusuke wasn't sure how he would feel seeing Keiko again, but now he was relieved. He would always love her, but not the same way that he did. Seeing her so many years after they fell apart showed him that he was just too afraid to live without her by his side. He had forgotten what it was like when they were friends.

"Are you happy?" he asked softly, neither of them noticing the people passing or the ticking of the clock. It was like time had frozen.

"So very much," she whispered as she once again put a hand on her belly. "Are you happy?" she questioned.

Yusuke looked away from her as he thought about the question. He had forgotten what happiness was. But then he met Sam who always seemed to provoke emotions he had forgotten about in his despair. Suddenly he smiled as he thought of her feisty attitude. She made him feel again and helped him out of the darkest corner of his mind.

He didn't know exactly what she meant to him. But she mattered. She made him feel.

He turned back towards Keiko. "I'm working on it," he said calmly, but the sudden light did not leave his eyes.

She smiled, her eyes refusing to look away from him as she examined every curve on his face. It was just as she remembered.

"Yusuke, it means a lot to me that you came. Everyday I remember the things that I said to you. I'm so sorry for letting your appearance blind me."

Yusuke shook his head. "Don't be sorry Keiko. I wasn't acting like myself. I'm still trying to get as close to my normal self as I can. I think that maybe now I will be able to."

She didn't say anything for a moment, her eyes an odd mixture between happy and guilty.

"Keiko, I'm ready when you are love."

Yusuke closed his eyes as she looked at her husband who had just arrived. Slowly the sound of traffic and people talking began to expand until it hit against his eardrums violently.

"Yusuke," she said quietly.

He opened his eyes, and watched as she reached up and lightly kissed his cheek.

"Goodbye," she whispered gently before backing away from him.

"Goodbye," he replied before she turned around and walked towards her husband. The smaller man smiled softly at her, not at all jealous by what he just witnessed.

If she were still with Yusuke, he would have been making a scene if he saw such a thing...

She passed one more glance behind her as she grabbed her husband's hand. Her smile was bright, pure and so happy that it filled Yusuke's heart up with warmth -he had done the right thing by letting her go.

Yusuke looked up towards the sky, and it was like the Sun was shining just for him. The wind was blowing all around, taking away all the sadness and pain that he had been keeping for so long. He felt like Yusuke –he felt reborn.

He began to walk, a new bounce to his step as he made his way. Unlike all the other times, he didn't pause when he reached the small white diner. Instead he walked right in, and when he spotted Sam he walked up to her, no hesitation in his steps.

She turned towards him, her eyes wide as she froze in the middle of a step. They hadn't seen each other since he painted her living room and installed her new doors. He wanted to make sure that he wasn't still stuck on Keiko before they got too involved. Now nothing was holding him back.

He continued on, his eyes no doubt showing his determination as he pressed his body against hers, his hand gently holding the back of her head as he bent down and pressed his lips against her own.

For a moment she didn't respond, but it didn't take her long to give in, the passion behind his kiss too strong for her to deny. His heart was pounding and he could feel that hers was to. As small as it was, the kiss was powerful and left them both breathless.

Slowly he broke the kiss and watched in amusement as she slowly opened her dazed eyes, her pupils slightly dilated and unfocused.

"Oh," she said softly before mumbling a few incoherent words and lowering her head as her cheeks began to redden.

She must have said something about getting back to work before she backed away from him, almost falling over in her haste before she darted towards the back. Yusuke chuckled as he watched her go, embarrassed by the hooting consumers and obviously confused by his sudden actions.

He saw Yukina smiling as she watched from the distance, tears in her eyes though she didn't dare let them fall. Yusuke put his hands in his pockets as he flashed her his famous, careless grin before leaving the diner.

That kiss told Sam all that needed to be said and though she obviously had trust issues, there was no way that Yusuke was going to let her go. He could feel that his time in the human world was running out. He wanted to spend that remaining time with her. He was willing to do whatever it took. He was done making himself suffer.


	7. Chapter 7

**Falling into Lust (Until I Fall into Love)**

**LilCookie84 and pourquoibella, you guys seriously rock and I am happy that someone enjoys this rather unconventional story. I hope you enjoy this chapter! =]**

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**Chapter Se****ven: I'm Scared**

She was pacing back and forth, her eyes wide and frantic as she walked around her newly decorated living room.

He had painted her walls, installed two new doors, saved her life…twice, and he…KISSED her! He freaking KISSED her!

She closed her eyes as she shook her head rapidly, trying as hard as she could to get the feeling of his strong lips on hers out of her mind. That was just a disaster waiting to happen. Her life was finally falling into place. She couldn't do this and risk messing everything up.

"What am I doing?" she yelled as she threw up her arms and then smacked her head –desperate to hush the soft voice her mind.

_You liked it…You like him…You want him…_it kept saying and it was driving her crazy, always staying in the back of her mind and coming forth anytime she began to think of_ him_. The man responsible of her torment.

It had been a few days since he kissed her and only a month since they met. That was way too soon for anything good to come of it. Still, he had been permanently scorched into her mind and she just couldn't fucking take it! All these emotions, all these thoughts and desires; she tried so hard to avoid all of it.

She put on a tough, heartless act, but god did she feel so weak. It terrified her that he was already inside of her head. Her parents did nothing but fight, her boyfriend did nothing but use her, and over time she had learned how to be alone - that it was safer to be alone. She never learned how to love because…she had never really loved before.

She was always selfish, distant, and blind towards anyone that wasn't her sister, and the fact that she desired someone after so long bothered her more than anything.

Whatever it was that she was feeling, it was raw and dangerous and she didn't want it.

_Yes you do…_

"Shut up!" she screeched as she once again smacked her head. All it gave her was an extreme headache. Was she truly going insane?

She jumped as a loud boom echoed throughout the room. She eyed the door, confused until she realized that there was someone at the other end. Wide-eyed she approached the door, her hand gripping her silver chained necklace as she slowly opened the door…

"Yukina!" she said as she let out a relieved sigh. She wasn't sure if she could face Yusuke at the moment. She needed to find a way to seal her heart from him before she could face him again. He had too much of a hold on her.

The level of attraction between them was dangerous. She never before knew the power of lusting after someone.

"Hi Sam, are you okay in there? I was hearing some muttering," Yukina said lightly. Somehow Sam knew that Yukina was aware of what she had been muttering about, her crimson eyes soft and understanding.

"Yup, I'm perfectly fine. What is it that you need?" Sam said a little too fast but Yukina didn't press it.

She was acting so opposite from herself and Yukina had surly noticed by now.

"I would like you to come over."

Sam opened her mouth, almost saying yes before she could really consider the question. _He_ was most likely going to be there. She was sure of it.

"Wonderful! Everyone is waiting so come on," Yukina said lightly as she began to descend the stairs.  
Sam stood there, mouth open as she tried to sort out what just happened. Finally she sighed, putting her mask tightly in place before following her colleague down the porch steps.

Yukina simply hummed -her eyes bright and happy as she practically skipped down the road. Sam watched her through narrowed eyes but Yukina continued on, obviously unbothered by the dark look.

When they reached her house they headed towards the back, Sam a few steps behind Yukina as she fought to keep herself under control. Her heart was beating so loud that she felt deaf, and every step felt heavier as she walked. She wanted to turn around and run away. Screw her pride! But she just couldn't. Her feet refused to go anywhere but forward. She was marching towards her downfall.

The moment she could see the backyard her eyes met emerald-green, her feet faltering in surprise as something tugged slightly on her mind. Her hand reached to her necklace, his eyes following the movement as she gripped the warm chain tightly. But she looked away, the feeling of something missing dimming until it was faint as her eyes landed on _his. _Just as quickly as it was up her mask fell, falling into pieces at her feet as she struggled to breath.

Ever since he saved her from her ex and she had awakened to a newly painted walls, she had found that he wouldn't leave her mind. From day one he had caught her attention, but he seemed like every other asshole she had run across. He however was different, in more ways than one, but she found that it didn't matter. She didn't understand, she felt so clueless and the only thing she knew was that in the short amount of time it had been, he had crawled his way in like a tick.

"Sam?"

She jumped -her hand on her heart as she looked over towards Yukina.

"You're crying," Yukina whispered gently as she reached towards Sam in attempted comfort.

She flinched away before saying, "I need to use the bathroom."

"Of course," she heard Yukina say behind her, but Sam had already reached the door.

She kept her head bent down as she entered the house and went straight towards the bathroom. She didn't bother to close the door as she put her head in her hands and fought for control.

She was crying? Why was she crying?

How could one mysterious man have this much power over her? It was going to end in disaster, it always did, and she didn't know if she could handle it. No matter what she did, no matter what she said, she never stopped being weak. That was all emotions were and she detested them.

A shadow in the doorway had her lifting her head, her eyes no doubt blood-shot as she stared into soft brown eyes. It seemed like so long ago that they were cold, frostbitten. What had happened that made him so…warm?

He didn't say anything, simply watched her as she dried her eyes and fought to build up her mask. She needed it…she couldn't let him see.

"I know what's it's like to feel like you have to hide away from the world Sam. You don't have to hide when you're around me," he finally said.

She shook her head, "I don't have to hide?" she said darkly, "It's all I know and all you're doing it messing up everything that I built!" she said, her voice raising in her confused anger as she stared at him wildly.

He didn't seem to mind. He stood there silently, his eyes knowing as he watched her unravel.

"Don't you see? I'm not a good person to be with. I'm selfish and cold and I don't know how to love. All I know is how to fight or fuck things up. I'm…better off alone."

He frowned slightly as he crossed his arms.

"Is that what you want…to be alone?" he asked calmly.

She blinked a few times as she looked away from him. Her anger was slowly slipping. This was all too much for her.

"You hide from me," she said softly, and though it wasn't the answer to his question she knew that he understood why she said it.

"No I don't," he said softly, "If you wish to know…if it will help you trust me, than I will tell you Sam. Just ask. My time here is limited, and pretty soon I will have to go...home."

Her eyes flashed to his. She was surprised, completely taken back and surprisingly worried.

"You're leaving?" she asked softly, her heart oddly sinking as the need to hold on to him overtook her. She fought the feeling off, wrapping her arms around herself so she wouldn't reach out to him.

It was an impulse that she was not willing to partake in.

He nodded.

"When?" she whispered softly.

He shrugged his shoulders carelessly, "Hell if I know."

His eyes then became serious as his mouth opened. He was going to tell her what made him so different…  
Before she could stop herself she moved forward and pressed her mouth against his in a chaste kiss. She pulled away only enough so that she could see his face clearly. He was looking at her questioningly.

"I don't need to know. Some things…are better left unknown."

She then gave in, the need to be close to him overpowering her and making her reach in for another kiss. This time he met her halfway and he held nothing back. With a deep growl he pulled her towards him, the surprise in the sudden demanding move making her gasp. He took advantage, his tongue gently entering her mouth. She moaned lightly as he slowly kissed her, a whirlwind of emotions flying around them rapidly.

She was melting into his arms, completely at his mercy.

She broke the kiss, her eyes closed as she backed away, her head shaking as she tried to get a grip on herself.

"Sam," he said gently as he lifted her chin so that she would look at him, "why are you crying?"

She was crying again?

"Because I'm scared," she whispered so quietly that she was surprised that he had heard.

"Of what?" he questioned soothingly. She knew that he was just urging her to say it out loud. He already knew of her inner turmoil. Was she that easy to read?

"Of…love; of trust; of being hurt again," she breathed out, "We both know how this will end Yusuke. If I come to love you and things get serious…we will only be torn away from one another. I don't think I can survive another heart-break."

She was ashamed by how defeated her voice sounded, and even more ashamed of how pathetic her fears really were.

"Than it's a matter of if it's worth it. I'm not asking you to love me Sam. I just want to be around you, spend time with you, be close to you as friends and maybe more," he said evenly, his eyes gazing into hers with so much passion that her heart seemed to sputter in her chest.

She knew what he was offering. Something casual, without ties and other problems that come from relationships, and she couldn't deny the part of her that was more than willing to fall into lust with him. She wasn't sure if it was a good idea, but...

His eyes were all around her, the warmth of his body coating her like a blanket as he waited patiently for her to speak. He wasn't afraid, this wasn't a trick, and despite the stories she heard of these kinds of things going wrong somehow she felt like it was right.

"How do I know if it's worth it?" she questioned out loud.

He smiled as he placed a large hand over her heart, careful to not touch her too inappropriate though she saw his eyes sparkle in mischief.

"What do you feel in here?" he asked seriously but his thumb was circling lightly, rubbing against the top of her breast.

Her face became red as she shoved him with all of her might. He only moved because he allowed himself to. That thought hit a nerve.

"You're feeling me up you pervert!" she shouted as she smacked his chest repeatedly.

He laughed -the sound so light and carefree that it had her smiling. Now she was seeing the real Yusuke and she found that she…liked it, as unconventional as it was.

"Don't act like you don't want me to touch other places," he teased but the suggestive look in his eyes had her choking on air.

He raised an eyebrow, amused as she patted her chest.

"Need help?" he asked.

"No!" she yelled as she barged out of the bathroom and towards the backyard.

He followed behind her, chuckling at her brisk walk as she fought the blush off of her face.

She walked over to Yukina, her eyes following Yusuke as he approached Kuwabara, Shizuru and Shuichi. This time the scrutiny of Shuichi's gaze did not bother her despite the usual tugging in her brain, and that was partly because Yusuke turned towards her, a large perverted smirk in place especially for her

What had she gotten herself into?


	8. Chapter 8

**Falling into Lust (Until I Fall into Love)**

**Chapter Eight: First Date**

"I'm happy for you man. It's nice to see you do something other than drink and mope."

Yusuke rolled his eyes, "Shut it Kuwabara."

"Yusuke, why don't you wear something nicer?" Yukina questioned as she looked him up and down with displeasure clear on her gentle face. He was wearing a black tee-shirt and old, baggy jeans. It was a miracle that there were no holes in them.

"Come on baby, you know Yusuke isn't romantic."

"I repeat, shut it Kuwabara."

"I mean, he has to be the most insensitive guy ever. He can't even wear something nice for a girl he obviously really likes. He's probably going to take her to McDonald's."

"Shut the hell up Kuwabara!" Yusuke yelled as he whirled around, ready to pound his friends face in.

"Okay, you two stop it. You need to leave now if you're going to get there on time," Yukina said sternly but she was smiling. It was nice to see them fighting again.

"Whatever. Why are you two in my house anyways?" he questioned as he stared at the couple suspiciously.

They glanced at each other, both of them having a light blush on their face.

"We were going to clean your house up while you were gone," Yukina admitted bashfully.

Yusuke's eyebrows disappeared in his bangs, "Why?"

Kuwabara coughed. "Well, if you decided to bring her here afterwords we didn't want it to be messy…or stinky."

Yusuke stared at them for a moment before turning around and walking out of his house. They assumed that he would take Sam on the date and then they would have hot wild sex all night. As nice as it sounded (and he was bound and determined to get to that point) he wanted her to be comfortable with him first. He was hoping that their little date would make her feel more secure when they were together. That was why he didn't dress any different. The less serious it seemed the more she will be at ease.

But if thing were to escalate...he wasn't going to stop it. Manners be damned. Truly it was all up to her on how things went, but while he was tempted he didn't feel like now was the time. He wanted to know who she was and wanted her to know him first.

It didn't take him long to reach her house. He was a tad nervous but he pushed it aside. He knew that she was a wreck and was probably having multiple meltdowns. She was worth it though, and Yusuke was willing to do something he was never very good at…He was willing to be the patient and calm one. He didn't want her to think that sex was all he was after.

He knocked on the door before sticking his hands in his pockets as he waited. He chuckled silently to himself as cursing and rustling came from the other side. Sam opened the door, her hair a little wild as she practically flew out of the doorway.

"Don't forget protection!" he heard her sister yell before Sam roughly slammed the door closed, almost pitching herself in the process.

She looked at Yusuke her eyes blank for a moment before she smiled.

"I'll get her back for that comment later," she said as Yusuke chuckled and began to lead her off of the porch.

He was doing his best to keep the air light, but he couldn't help but look her up and down. She was wearing a gray tee-shirt that hugged her form and hung from her right shoulder. The black jeans she was wearing were slightly baggy but still didn't hide her body. It was hard to ignore and he really dug her style. Instead of girly dresses she was a fan of jeans.

"So where are we headed?" she questioned as she put her hands behind her head and looked up towards the darkening sky.

"You'll see," Yusuke said casually.

Not too long later he led her off of the sidewalk.

"Um, this is a random path in the woods," she said slowly, almost like she was unsure if he knew where they were going.

Yusuke chuckled. "Don't worry. You can trust me. I know where I'm going," and then he held out his hand.  
She looked at it for a moment, obviously debating on if she should take it or not. She met his eyes and slowly put her tiny hand in his. He smiled encouragingly before leading her into the darkness.

"I can't see," she whispered, the silence giving the air a serene feel.

"There's a rock," he said right before she tripped over it. The only thing that stopped her from falling on her face was his hand in hers.

He smiled widely, though he was sure she couldn't see it.

She smacked his arm. "Seriously Yusuke? You did that on purpose!" she hissed angrily.

He chuckled before pulling her closer. He heard her take in air as he lowered his mouth to her ear and whispered, "I need to lift you up."

He felt her nod.

He carefully wrapped his arms around her and effortlessly lifted her as high as his arms would allow. She reached forward, her hands grasping roots and dirt as she pulled herself up. Once she was steady he half jumped, half climbed up the dirt wall and was soon sitting beside her before she could even get settled herself.  
Her eyes were wide as she stared out into the black water. The moon gave her enough light to see, the thick tree's in the forest not reaching far enough to block the dim lighting.

"It's beautiful," she whispered as she watched the waves beat against the shore gently, the moon reflecting off of the hue lit water.

"I found it by accident. I was roaming around the forest and ended up here a year or so ago. If we get caught here we would be arrested."

He nearly laughed when she spun her head towards him, her eyes wide in disbelief. After a moment a small smirk lifted the corner of her lips as she stood up on the sand pit.

"We'll, we're already at risk of being put in jail. Why not press our luck? No pain no gain right?"

Yusuke returned her smirk as he took her outstretched hand. He didn't let go of it as they made their way down, his eyes watching her carefully as she slid across the sand. She didn't mind getting dirty and not once did she complain. It was a nice change for Yusuke.

Once they were down she looked around with amazed eyes before taking off her socks and shoes.

"It's been so long since I have felt the sand in-between my toes," she moaned as she smiled softly up at the star filled sky.

Yusuke swallowed, his mouth becoming dry as he watched the wind blow her golden hair around her face. It was sight to behold, and he couldn't believe how far along he had come in such a short time. All it took was this tiny woman beside him and all of a sudden everything seemed so far away. He wasn't drowning in the past, he wasn't dreading the future -he was in the present and he planned on making the best of it.

They were far from where he wanted to be –buried under the covers, completely lost in one another –but he understood that she wanted to know him, his in's and out's and everything in-between. That was what this date was about -getting to know one another.

Just because they weren't official didn't mean that they couldn't know and care about each other.

He took a deep breath before pushing the rather provocative images of Sam sprawled out naked on the sand from his mind.

"Come on," he said gently as he began to walk forward.

She followed, her eyes watching the waves as they moved in silence. She didn't reach for his hand; she didn't have to in order to know that he was there. The more Yusuke was around her the more he realized what Keiko had realized a long time ago.

"What's your favorite color?" she suddenly questioned.

Yusuke smiled. He was waiting for the question game to begin.

"Green," he answered automatically.

She raised her eyebrows in surprise as she looked up at him. He was looking forward, but he could see her clearly out of the corner of his eye.

"I would have thought it was blue."

"Why?" Yusuke questioned as he glanced at her from the side.

She shrugged. "I don't know. Tough, mysterious guys seem to like blue."

He snorted. "Mysterious? I'm usually called inappropriate."

She huffed. "Wonder why." Her sarcasm was easily noted.

"You're favorite color is royal purple," he stated smoothly.

She stopped walking and looked at him questioningly.

He smiled -his hands in his pockets as he turned halfway around so he could look at her.

"Your room was decorated in purple," he laughed, amused by her unnecessary suspicion.

"Oh…right," she said quietly as she looked out into the water, her face clear of emotion. She was pulling away from him. He could tell by how closed off her face was. When he first saw her at the diner he could tell by her smile that she hid herself away. He didn't want that.

"What's your full name?" he asked casually as he sat down in the sand. She remained standing.

"Samantha Heart."

"What's your favorite food?"

"Chicken."

"How old are you?"

"26."

"Do you think I'm sexy?"

"Yes…what?" she yelled as she snapped her head to him in surprise.

He couldn't help it; he began to laugh -tears forming in his eyes at the horrified expression on her face. Once he finally calmed he smiled his famous smile before his eyes flashed suggestively.

"You're attraction is returned. Don't worry," he said teasingly, but he knew that she could tell that he was very much serious.

He watched her throat move as she swallowed before she sat down. Her eyes averted from his as she stared down at her hands.

"You're not like other guys Yusuke. You're…honest about thing," she said softly.

"That's because I'm not just after a pair of nice tits and a wide open entrance. The only time a guy acts like a gentleman is if he wants some action. But if you want to I'm definitely down for that."

She then began to laugh, the sound so buoyant and carefree that if Yusuke weren't already sitting, he would have sunk to his knees by the pure magnificence of it. It was the first time he had ever heard her laugh without it being bitter or forced. It left him speechless.

She wasn't offended; she wasn't disgusted. She was truly like no other woman he had ever met.

"Oh my god," she huffed as she wiped the tears from her eyes, "I can't believe you just said that."

He chuckled, "My mouth doesn't have much of a filter. I think it, I say it."

She nodded. "So I have noticed." She then turned her head towards him, a light smile in place just for him and no one else. "But I like that about you. When I first met you, you were so…guarded. I like this Yusuke a lot more."

They then fell silent, only the sound of the waves making any noise as they spoke something silent with just their eyes. They liked each other more and more with each minute...and they silently agreed to simply enjoy the moment; not over complicating things like what happens when you start a relationship.

Yusuke grabbed her hand.

~~~W~W~W~~~  
Sam would never have thought that she would be on an illegal part of the beach with a man that she had only met a month ago. She found that the more she was around him the more that the time frame seemed less important.

He was wild, crazy, careless and at times completely and utterly impulsive. He was making her laugh harder than she had her whole life. Without her even realizing it he was tearing down every wall she had ever built. She found though, once she noticed, that she didn't even care.

"Yusuke," she said as they began to walk back to the man-made dirt wall,"why were you the way you were when I first met you? You said that you were getting over crap having to do with a girl but it was cryptic. You seemed like you were purposely trying to get me to hate you."

Yusuke sighed and just when she thought that he wasn't going to answer he said, "My last relationship ended horribly and for a long time I wasn't myself. Some of my friends thought that I shouldn't allow myself to get close to you. I…am different remember? They didn't want me getting involved with anyone. Even in a casual since."

"Shuichi," she stated blandly, ignoring the odd tugging in her brain. Something starting with a "_Kur"_ was at the tip of a forgotten memory, but she pushed it aside.

"Yeah, he's just concerned. He thinks I'm being impulsive."

She snorted. "And you're not? Your change in attitude was pretty quick."

Yusuke then appeared in front of her, his eyes almost golden under the dim moonlight.

"No," he said deeply, "when it comes to you I'm being anything but impulsive. If I was being impulsive believe me, we would both be covered in sand from head to toe. I just realized that I shouldn't let people stop me from getting what I want."

Her cheek flushed at his suggestive statement, but she could tell that he wasn't joking. He was dead serious. He then began to lead her once more, both of them lost in their own thoughts as they went.

Before she even knew it they were approaching her house.

Her heart began to beat in her chest as she started to get nervous. What was going to happen now? She had never really been on a date before, her attitude always doing a good job at scaring away men of all types. Was he going to kiss her, seduce her, or go all cold on her again? What if he had somehow changed his mind about her in their few moments of silence?

What if they...became intimate, and he pulled away from her? No matter what she knew that it was not going to end happy ever after.

They reached her doorsteps and Sam paused as she turned around to look up at him. He looked completely calm and she hoped that he didn't see her nervousness. She felt ashamed by how easily he made her feel uncertain of herself when he seemed cool as a cucumber.

"I'll see you around Sam," he said smoothly as he bent down and gently kissed her on the top of her head.  
For a moment she just stood there as he turned around and began to walk away.

_What the hell? That's it, a simple see you around? _

She fumed for only a second before her confidence came back.

"Yusuke!" she called out before she even realized it.

It was slow motion as he turned around, the darkness making his appearance that much more exotic as the streetlights lit up half of his body. She began to move forward, her heart sounding like a drum in her chest. She pressed herself up against him, her mouth crashing onto his with so much urgency that it left her breathless.

It didn't take him long to respond, his arms wrapping around her as he deepened the kiss.

The only way she could explain it was hot and its effect on her was starting to cloud her mind.

Slowly they pulled away, both of them breathing hard as they fought to catch their breath. She opened her eyes and met his deep brown ones. He was obviously surprised but she couldn't deny the passion and desire that were burning in them. He was just as affected as she was.

"Goodnight," she whispered breathlessly before turning around and heading inside. Her heart protested, she wanted to invite him in, but the words just wouldn't come out. She was done with time frames. Now she was just going to go with what she felt and while she desired him she wasn't quite ready for that yet. She never had a casual thing with someone; she didn't know how it was supposed to go.

"Goodnight," she heard him say from behind her right before she shut the door.

She leaned against it, her hand touching her tingling lips as she closed her eyes.

He was definitely worth it, and she was happy to just be with him regardless of where things go. But she couldn't think of that right now. She just had to accept her time with him and hope that she was strong enough to handle the ending whatever it may be.


	9. Chapter 9

**Falling into Lust (Until I Fall into Love)**

**Chapter nine: The Talk: Birds and the Demons**

Yusuke sat in his chair, his head rested on the palm of his hand as he stared at the fox demon sitting on the couch opposite him. Neither of the men spoke, the only sound coming from the TV that was long since forgotten. Yusuke hated it when people gave him speeches, especially when it was about his own damn life, but since Kurama was his friend he stayed put.

But he was wearing a glare that said more than enough.

"Are you aware of what you are doing Yusuke?" Kurama asked calmly.

"Duh," Yusuke snorted, showing his annoyance by his narrowed eyes and slouched body.

"Do you wish to hurt her? Because that is the direction you are going in."

Yusuke sat up, his gaze dangerous though he remained silent. Kurama's eyes showed his satisfaction. All he wanted was to get Yusuke's attention –to have a serious conversation with him.

"I only want you considered all the outcomes," Kurama said smoothly. "I know by now you have noticed that she is not so stable herself. If you suddenly have to leave, how do you think she will react? She will be damaged and there will be no way to comfort her. She will think that you abandoned her. Do you even care about her well-being at all?"

Yusuke sat back in his chair, his eyes softening as he realized that Kurama wasn't trying to make him change his mind but instead show him all the possibilities. Yes, he saw what Kurama was saying. But…there was no way that he could pull away from her when he was getting so close to having her.

"Kurama me and Sam are really great friends and I care about her more than I could probably show. I can't say that I love her and that she loves me, but I don't think either of us are looking for that right now anyway. Besides, she knows."

Kurama's eyes sharpened as his face filled with alarm.

"Please tell me you didn't…"

"No," Yusuke interrupted. "She's like you when it comes to reading in-between the lines. I offered her an explanation…and she said that some things are better left unknown."

Kurama was obviously surprised, his eyes no longer narrowed in worry but instead wide in wonder and slight pain thought Yusuke didn't think much of it.

"You told her that you would be leaving soon?" Kurama questioned.

Yusuke nodded though he really had nothing to say. He had made up his mind and nothing was going to change it. Not unless Sam changed her own.

It really was messed up how they were going to make Yusuke leave before Kurama. His mother was getting older and when she finally passed the fox would have no reason to stay –but that might take years.

Sure, Yusuke had friends in the Demon World but he didn't grow up there.

Kurama stood up. "You have made up your mind then," he stated.

One look at Yusuke's eyes and Kurama knew the answer. He didn't have to respond. Kurama nodded slightly before heading towards the front door. He was feeling hungry.

~~W~~W~~W~~  
Sam sighed. There were times when her job became extremely boring. Lately it was slow; all the kids who used to come and hang out after school were now off doing other things.

Since she had so much free time she often found herself spaced out, her date from a few night ago swimming around in her mind every chance it got. It seemed like each hour that passed by only made her feelings deepen. It was odd, scary, but so very exiting. Yusuke was good at keeping her on her toes.

"You have someone at one of your tables," one of the waitresses said as they passed, an ounce of jealousy in the black-haired womans voice though it was easily ignored. Serena was never a fan of Sam's.

She shook her head, ridding of her dazed state of mind before heading over to her section. She opened her notepad, not looking up at her costumer until they spoke.

"I would like to have a word, if you don't mind."

Her head snapped up, her eyes surprised as she stared into calm green eyes.

Shuichi -the man who was against her and Yusuke having anything to do with one another. She narrowed her eyes as she sat across from him, her lips in a thin line as she waited for him to speak.

"Well?" she asked impatiently.

He still didn't speak, his eyes remaining calm as he simply watched her like she was an interesting animal he had never seen before.

She snapped.

"Look," she said firmly, "I know that you're only concerned so I'll do my best to say this nicely. Whatever your problem is, I don't care. I recognize that my time with Yusuke will be short and that when he has to go I will have no choice but to let him go. If I come to…"

"Love him," Kurama offered smoothly and reluctantly Sam nodded.

"Than it will hurt…but everything ends at some point. Am I a fool for thinking that a short amount of time with him is worth it? Before Yusuke all I had was anger and bad memories. I know he is different…but I don't care. I recognize when something is better left a mystery and I also recognize when something should be cherished...even if I don't want it to be," Sam sighed, her eyes suddenly losing their passionate fire in place of a softer look. "Sure he's an asshole, perverted, and should brush his hair more, but if he was a posh, polished grown man with money falling out of his ass than he would bore me. He wouldn't be Yusuke."

Shuichi was silent for a moment before he smiled. Sam was taken back as she looked over her shoulder, making sure that he wasn't smiling at something behind her. Why was he smiling when he had been giving her a rather void look the whole time she was talking?

"I see why he likes you so much," he said softly, his eyes suddenly knowing too many things for her to register though there was an odd, dark undertone. It sounded almost like he was being a tad sarcastic though she could see that he was genuine. She just didn't know how to take the man sitting in front of her.

"Uh..." she said stupidly which only made his eyes sparkle in amusement.

"I didn't come here to try to talk you away from him. I merely wanted to see what he saw."

Sam blinked. "And what would that be?"

He was silent for a moment, his eyes slowly losing their light though they still remained kind; outwardly. It made Sam wonder what he was thinking that he wanted to hide from her. Why would he seek her out like this just to have a simple conversation where she mainly babbled like a moron?

She just didn't understand any of it. Especially the feeling of forgetting something important anytime he was around. It was unnerving.

"He see's someone who is willing to accept him despite his differences," he finally said, his voice smooth though a touch deeper in sound.

This conversation was not going in the direction that Sam had imagined it would.

"You can only be as accepted as you allow yourself to be," she replied softly, remembering how Yusuke was so distant from her when it all began.

She herself had the habit of pushing others away. But she had realized that it was no life when it didn't consist of people you care about.

Something odd flashed in Shuichi's eyes though he didn't speak. She had a feeling that the man sitting in front of her did his best to separate himself from other people. Everything he did seemed to have an arm's length of distance. For the first time since she met Shuichi she saw something dangerous, hidden and wild inside of him. He did everything he could to put on this nice clean guy act; Sam was no longer fooled.

"Tell me," Sam said slowly, "was the only reason why you didn't want Yusuke to get involved with me is because of our…differences? I have a feeling that there is more."

He didn't look away from her once though she could tell that he was thinking over her words carefully and strategically choosing his reply. There was nothing in his face that gave it away but he was silent, he was contemplating. And his eyes were boring into her so deeply that she gripped the edge of the table so she wouldn't get lost in them.

He was dangerous indeed.

Finally he spoke, his voice soft and even. "No matter how much I may want her I knew that if she was to love me like I love her, than I would not be able to leave when the time came. She is so damaged. I would have only harmed her more. Her heart is wild and she happens to be the most self-destructive person I have ever met."

Sam blinked. "So, you were concerned that Yusuke wouldn't be able to leave because you wouldn't be able to? I don't plan to stop him from going home. And me and Yusuke...I don't think we love each other just yet. We're happy without those kinds of complications."

He did not reply but instead turned towards the window, a small bitter smile on his lips. Once more she could feel it, a tugging his her brain. She felt sad and a bit of longing; two feelings that seemed rather out-of-place with the situation.

"Maybe if you had something to keep you here then you won't have to leave. I think that despite me and Yusuke creating a relationship he wants to go back to wherever, even if he doesn't know it. It's obvious that you don't. So find something to keep you here Shuichi, and don't cast it aside because it's what_ you_ think is best. You could have been wrong about her," she said absent-mindedly.

He turned toward her, that same odd light in his eyes. He was examining her again but this time it didn't bother her. She hoped that he found whatever it was that he was looking for. Her eyes met his head on.

The tugging in her brain was almost painful, making her grimace slightly as she rubbed her forehead with a small frown. She fought the need to vomit. Why did that keep happening and what was causing it?

"It is too late for me to have her for time already swept her away from me. It is odd, in the past I would have never allowed it to happen. I used to always get what I desired, no matter the cost. That was always my biggest downfall, until now." And then he stood up, his eyes a shield to his thoughts and more murky in color. "Thank you for the enlightenment," he said politely before walking away, not even waiting for her to reply.

With each step her heart ached even more.

* * *

**Thank you to everyone who reviewed! Sorry for the wait. I don't have internet so hopefully the grammar is alright. This sorry is complete so it's just a matter of posting them all.**

Thank you for you're patience! There is about four chapters left!


	10. Chapter 10

**Falling into Lust (Until I Fall into Love)**

**Chapter Ten: Adults will be Kids  
**  
The group of adults laughed at the two grown men giving each other a noogie so aggressively that it must have hurt. Sam merely shook her head as she watched Yusuke body slam Kazuma who at the last second kicked Yusuke in the face.

"Oh dear," Yukina whined though she was smiling.

"All over a hotdog," Sam mumbled in disbelief.

"Believe me, they fight over more obtuse things," Shuichi said casually, a book in his hands though he too was watching the childish display.

It's been months since they had that conversation at the diner. She never told Yusuke about it and it was never brought up. It seemed best to just forget it though in reality she never truly did. Every time she saw Shuichi she remembered and each time she looked at him a little differently.

Who was it that he so selflessly gave up and why did she get the feeling like she knew the answer?

"It's mine!"

"No it's mine!"

"Screw this," Sam said blandly as she stood up and marched over towards the large men that were acting more like children than the real child who was silently coloring in a coloring book at her moms feet.

Yusuke now had the hotdog in his right hand, his left hand holding Kazuma's face away as he tried to reach it. Right when Yusuke was going to swallow it in one bite Sam snatched it away, her eyes narrowed darkly as she stared at them with a slight smirk.

Both of the men stopped, Kazuma's eyes peeking through the spaces between Yusuke's fingers.

"You're both wrong. It's mine," she said calmly as she took a dainty bite and without another word she sat back down, Yukina giggling on her left and Shuichi chuckling on her right.

Sam smiled at their crestfallen expressions. They looked like children who just dropped their ice-cream cone on a sunny day, their eyes wide and shining in comical tears.

Suddenly Kazuma and Yusuke turned towards each other, wide grins on both of their faces before they turned their devious eyes on Sam.

"Uh oh," she mumbled as she turned towards Shuichi, her eyes begging for him to protect her from the inevitable.

He smiled sheepishly. "I suggest you run."

She glared at him for a moment before mumbling. "Thanks for the help."

She then turned to Yukina but she simply said, "Not even I can stand in-between their love for food."

Sam was in this alone.

She stood up from her chair and backed away from the approaching men, the hotdog still in her hand though it was long forgotten. This was a dangerous situation to be in, and if she didn't play her cards right than she was going to pay…for stealing their wiener…She has been spending too much time with Yusuke.

"Ah!" she squeaked as they ran at her.

She managed to dodge Kazuma, his weight making him slow enough for her to maneuver around his arms as he tried to grabbed ahold of her. She wasn't too sure where Yusuke had gotten to, but her hands were full enough with a ravenous Kazuma. She knew how to fight (it was either that or die) but that was so long ago. She was getting out of shape and it was tiring trying to dodge a humongous man who had more energy than she did and exercised everyday.

Finally she managed to get away from him and as quickly as her body would allow she ran. She met the wooden fence that the backyard was caged inside of; completely blocked from making a real escape she turned around, her chest heaving as she tried to get her breath back and think up a plan at the same time.

Yusuke was hiding somewhere, unseen, and Kazuma was slowly approaching with a wide creepy smile on his face. She had no other options…she was trapped…she had no other choice…

"Be gone!" she screamed as she tossed the hotdog as hard as she could.

Kazuma froze as it hit the dead center of his chest, ketchup and mustard staining his white wife-beater. He began to laugh, his hands on his knees, but that wasn't the only laugher Sam was hearing.

Behind her…

Slowly she turned around but before she could see who it was she was suddenly flying through the air, heading straight towards the newly installed underground pool. She was completely submerged in the cold water, some of it burning her throat since her mouth was open in a silent scream.

Slowly she rose to the surface, coughing slightly as she blinked the water out of her eyes. Yusuke and Kazuma were rolling in the grass, their loud laughter no doubt waking the dead as she pulled herself up, her jean shorts and white tee-shirt sticking to her skin like glue. She was positive that everyone could see her purple bra but at the moment she didn't care. She wanted revenge.

A dark smile tainted her lips as she spotted a long green water gun lying by the pool. Since they were too busy celebrating their false victory they didn't notice her pick it up. She pulled it back, the gun expanding as it sucked up water and then once it was full she motioned towards Yukina.

She smiled brightly as she made her over, also not being noticed as she grabbed the purple one and just like Sam filled it up.

They stood side by side, their guns pointed at the still laughing men as they mouthed, "1, 2, 3," then they released fire.

"Hey!" the men shouted as their laughter stopped and was instead replaced with random profanities.

Kazuma was blinking rapidly, completely confused as he looked all around, trying to figure out where the mass amount of water was coming from. Yusuke was merely rolling around, trying to get away from the water so he could get his hair out of his face.

Neither of the women could help it. They began to laugh, drawing unwanted attention to themselves as they crouched over -tears falling from Sam's eyes while Yukina just giggle uncontrollably. But just then their guns ran out of liquid ammo.

"Crap! Reload Yukina, reload!" Sam shouted as they both began to fill up their guns, peeking over their shoulders as the men began to recuperate at an alarming speed.

This was a war that Sam was unsure of continuing.

"Retreat!" Yukina cried as she threw her gun in the water and anxiously yanked on Sam's arm.

"No, we have to finish this!" Sam ordered but it was taking too long and both of the men were on their feet, smiling in mischief.

There was no time to respond, no time to react for suddenly something hard hit both of them as four bodies became swallowed by the water. Sam emerged from the water, once more coughing as she rubbed the chlorine out of her eyes.

Yukina popped up from beside her, frowning in displeasure though her eyes were bright with happiness.

"Good going. Because of your pride we we're now soaking wet and I'll have to shower again," Yukina teased.

Sam snorted in amusement. "Maybe if _somebody_ didn't abandon their post the bozo's wouldn't have won…"

"Bozos!" Kazuma and Yusuke shouted from the shallow end of the pool before the two females were suddenly being attacked by water.

A Sunset and lots of laughter later everyone got out of the pool, Kazuma and Yukina grabbing some towels while Yusuke went inside to do god knows what (though it probably involved food). Sam walked over to Shuichi who had sat out from the fun though he still seemed amused by their childish antics.

She smiled at him, her arms wrapped around herself as she sat in the chair across from him.

"That was fun. I can't remember ever doing things like that when I was a kid," Sam said lightly, a ghost of a smile still on her lips as she looked up towards the darkened sky.

"Be expected to be dragged into a lot of moment like that," Shuichi said softly.

She turned towards him, her eyes bright and childish as she said, "You didn't join and I'm pretty sure we got you with the squirt gun."

Shuichi chuckled. "Only my shoes. Besides, I have had a long time to get water fights out of my system."

"You're making yourself sound old. You need a good well-behaved woman to take care of you so that you don't have to strain yourself any longer," Sam teased.

"Hmm, I find that I get bored easily. I would prefer one with spirit and a strong mind."

Sam rolled her eyes as she watched Yusuke approach, drying his long hair with a red towel. He gently handed her a white one that she simply wrapped around her torso so that her bra was no longer showing.

"Ready to go?" he asked as he passed Shuichi a slight glance.

"Most definitely. I need a shower."

Yusuke wiggled his eyebrows. "Need help?"

"That's sweet of you to offer but I'm capable of getting clean on my own," Sam said sarcastically as she stood up.

Yusuke chuckled as they both said their goodbyes and then headed on their way.

The night was slightly chilly due to the crisp wind, but it was nice compared to how hot it was earlier. Sam felt like a roasting turkey every time she left the shade.

"You and Shuichi seem to be getting along a lot better now," Yusuke said casually.

But what wasn't casual was that he brought Shuichi up out of the blue.

"Yeah, he's a mystery. I never know just what he's thinking."

"I think I do," Yusuke mumbled under his breath, but Sam was too desperate to get clean and warm to really pay attention though perhaps she should have.

They walked up to her yellow house, Sam turning towards him as she leaned in for a kiss. It was slow and gentle, still full of unreleased desire and passion despite the months it's been since they first met. She still couldn't say that she loved him, their relationship not even put into terms but they cared about each other -deeply- and Yusuke was the first man to ever get her trust.

Sam leaned back, her eyes dazed as she smiled confidently.

"I want to come over tomorrow."

Yusuke blinked, and then blinked again as he thought about what she just said. Did she mean…

"Sure, I have steaks in the freezer."

She simply pecked him on the lips again before walking inside, leaving him to wonder if she meant what he thought she did.

Oh _god_ did he hoped so…

* * *

**Next chapter is called Falling Into Lust and finally what the story as been gaining towards will happen. Lemon time!**

I hope the grammar is okay, but only having internet at work makes it a little hard to edit it correctly. If there is anything big let me know!


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